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amc597

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amc597

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2386
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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amc597's page activity

Visits<b>Chrissyella</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 7:38pm<b>ProximityToDeath</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:07pm<b>colinabi</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 11:55am<b>ThatLobster</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:37pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 12:42pm<b>hiitsmeeeeeee</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 2:41pm<b>Earth_walker</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 4:49pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:26pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 7:58pm<b>MrTubzy</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 7:21pm<b>Zevulon</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 6:40pm<b>InDoctorWeTrust</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 2:25pm<b>snowaholicmxz</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 10:51pm<b>abbythemuffin</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 8:45pm<b>StupidMonkey497</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 1:07am<b>Dosenpfand</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:33am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 3:10am<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 5:27pm

amc597's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of amc597's badges

amc597's favorite FMLs

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

#21031414
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51395) - you deserved it (9634)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58260) - you deserved it (5845)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, as a pickup line, a guy said to me, "Yo, can I kiss your vag' under the mistletoe?" FML

#20985559
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50934) - you deserved it (4822)

On 12/08/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by mistletoe (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at work as a cashier, I was scanning cantaloupes. The man buying them then looked me straight in the eye and said, "Nice melons." FML

#20900810
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35578) - you deserved it (4610)

On 09/29/2013 at 5:12pm - work - by Nice Melons (woman) - United States

Today, while on the airplane, the cute girl next to me and I instantly hit it off. When I excused myself to the bathroom, I must have given her the wrong impression. She wanted to join the mile high club; I just wanted to take a crap. FML

#20781742
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58702) - you deserved it (12293)

On 07/14/2013 at 6:41am - intimacy - by mile high clubber - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

#20777221
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55738) - you deserved it (4344)

On 07/12/2013 at 3:22am - misc - by ouch (man) - United States

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

#20775868
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59362) - you deserved it (6968)

On 07/11/2013 at 11:18am - work - by vet1 (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

#20673456
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46720) - you deserved it (3588)

On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48007) - you deserved it (3369)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60630) - you deserved it (9161)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, it's my only day off work in a while. I told my boss I'd be available via phone in case of emergencies. So far I've been called three times: To ask how the fax works, to let me know it's a slow day, and to ask me where the letter R is on a keyboard. FML

#20604416
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48503) - you deserved it (5663)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:17am - work - by Anonymous - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I found out that the catchy Japanese song I've been obsessed with for the past week is actually about a dildo. FML

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60848) - you deserved it (20289)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out why the parents whose children I babysit use me so often and on such short notice. It's not because they have abrupt nights out; it's because their kids hate me, and me being around is their way of punishing them. FML

#20541928
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33963) - you deserved it (3393)

On 03/13/2013 at 10:41am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I finally felt motivated to do some exercise. As I got my weights out, I noticed out of the corner of my eye someone moving about outside my window. I got scared and dropped a weight on my foot. The person outside was my own reflection. FML

#20195266
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18549) - you deserved it (8648)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:10pm - health - by i see fat people (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)



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