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amberlou_2012

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amberlou_2012

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1463
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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amberlou_2012's page activity

Visits<b>zandalee</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 4:56am<b>Cumminsdan</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 3:47am<b>Conn3ct</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 9:45am<b>kievking</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 3:33pm<b>SirCharles83</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 12:18pm

amberlou_2012's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of amberlou_2012's badges

amberlou_2012's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML

#21387543
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31698) - you deserved it (2498)

On 04/04/2015 at 1:32pm - health - by fuck right off (man) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, while waxing a client's chest, I forgot to have him turn his head. When I ripped the strip, I punched him in the face. FML

#21379638
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24240) - you deserved it (7526)

On 03/22/2015 at 6:32pm - work - by waxer150 - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom demanded that I go into the basement and fix the water heater. I told her that I had no idea how to fix it, so she threw my phone down the stairs, told me to Google it, and locked the basement door behind me. It's been two hours. FML

#21371408
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70) - you deserved it (2399)

On 03/09/2015 at 8:28pm - misc - by MyMomIsInsane - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

#21360688
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34297) - you deserved it (8232)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm - misc - by wife - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML

#21357430
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32467) - you deserved it (12926)

On 02/16/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by cactii - United States

Today, my daughter got her first period. Nobody was home but my husband. He didn't know what to do, except give her a sponge to put in her underwear. FML

#21356191
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36244) - you deserved it (3463)

On 02/14/2015 at 7:34pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized why you should never wear a thong under yoga pants that are a couple of sizes too small. It's a weird thing, seeing your co-workers anus. FML

#21344664
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24744) - you deserved it (2745)

On 01/26/2015 at 6:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

#21330185
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35431) - you deserved it (6673)

On 01/03/2015 at 7:23pm - love - by allgassedout (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

#21306286
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38308) - you deserved it (3160)

On 11/26/2014 at 3:45pm - misc - by void bowels() { cry(); } (man) - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, I have to deal with being laughed at by my mother and sister, because they keep making sharp movements towards me, causing me to flinch. This is because I got mugged and beaten last night. They think it's hysterical. FML

#21304446
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44216) - you deserved it (2754)

On 11/23/2014 at 12:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to babysit both my neighbor's 3-year-old daughter and my very pregnant cat. I left the room briefly, only to come back to a traumatized 3-year-old crying in horror as my cat gave birth in front of her. FML

#21303819
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32509) - you deserved it (3764)

On 11/22/2014 at 10:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML

#21303024
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32144) - you deserved it (15154)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by AOart1st (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work, I put on a smile and went to take an elderly gentleman's order. He looked at me, asked if I'd stick a finger in his sweet tea to make it sweeter, then complained that it was a shame I wasn't "on the menu". FML

#21302690
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31717) - you deserved it (3599)

On 11/20/2014 at 11:20am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML

#21302094
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31612) - you deserved it (6383)

On 11/19/2014 at 1:44pm - misc - by limpdick9 - United States (California)

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

#21286701
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26372) - you deserved it (34519)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Indiana)



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