amazingnicole

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Offline (the 01/23/2015 at 5:37pm)

amazingnicole

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 September 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 798
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About amazingnicole : :)

amazingnicole's page activity

Visits<b>kj8387</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 4:03pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 2:05pm<b>boostedc</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 5:49am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 7:24pm<b>mrainesm</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 5:12pm<b>LilTiki559</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 12:10pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 12:00pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 12:57pm<b>badluckross</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 8:56pm<b>Johnny_Boy_Jr</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 12:45am<b>FilbertMoo</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 3:26pm<b>thewoodenbus</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 10:02pm<b>KibblyDoo</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 2:29pm<b>woiz</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 11:23pm<b>Darkestsoul</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 10:57am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 9:03pm<b>beach_boy1992</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 5:01pm

amazingnicole's FML badges

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amazingnicole's favorite FMLs

Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML

by Anonymous / 05/11/2014 at 8:14pm / New Zealand (Hawke's Bay) / Love

Today, I farted so loudly I not only woke myself up, but my husband as well. He mistook my gas for someone trying to break in and insisted on checking the whole house. I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. FML

by gassymomma / 04/28/2014 at 12:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML

by caught out / 04/26/2014 at 7:29pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, my dad told me I was folding my laundry all wrong. I said with a smirk, "A little clothes-minded, are we?" He slapped me. Hard. FML

by fml / 09/03/2013 at 2:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML

by our kids will be derps / 06/22/2013 at 3:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

by SkeetinKeaton / 05/06/2013 at 2:29am / United States / Kids

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

by chase / 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of four years broke up with me by writing on my bathroom mirror in Sharpie. What did he write? "Hi, I'm Emily. I'm fat, ugly, and now single." FML

by Emily / 01/03/2013 at 1:42am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2012 at 10:50am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML

by Uncircumcised Penis / 07/24/2012 at 5:51am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML

by anonymous / 03/14/2012 at 1:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I went to my first class of the semester. After an hour of intense note writing, I realized I was in the wrong class. FML

by student414 / 01/10/2012 at 12:15pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Geek