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amandaaxbc

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amandaaxbc

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  • Number of visits : 168
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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amandaaxbc's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

#21076106
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52469) - you deserved it (13366)

On 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm - animals - by Anonytard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML

#21075644
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47210) - you deserved it (6685)

On 03/02/2014 at 3:44am - love - by ouch (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I went on a date with a girl my friend set me up with. I thought we got along great, until after dessert, when I asked if she'd be interested in doing this again. She just said, "Nahhh" then got up and casually left, stiffing me on the bill. FML

#21074975
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43279) - you deserved it (4931)

On 03/01/2014 at 1:46pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I confessed my love for the girl I like, on the forum she moderates. She responded by banning me. FML

#21074335
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35524) - you deserved it (14699) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/28/2014 at 4:26pm - love - by Depirama (man) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I was chilling out with my friend in a parking lot, when a police officer came up to the vehicle and suspiciously asked what we were up to. My friend sarcastically said, "Uh, doing drugs? Planning a drive-by? Haha!" We soon found ourselves in the back of a cop car. FML

#21067749
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35322) - you deserved it (16483)

On 02/21/2014 at 4:37pm - misc - by Cuntface McGee (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, I told my husband how frisky I was feeling, and asked him what he was going to do about it. He reached into our fruit bowl, tossed me a banana and told me to work it out, then returned to his video game. FML

#21061692
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52538) - you deserved it (7839)

On 02/15/2014 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom made a Facebook status about me: "My daughter is on her rags and won't shut the fuck up #annoyingbitch". FML

#21057121
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47578) - you deserved it (8053)

On 02/11/2014 at 11:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at work, a customer asked me to unlock the restroom for them. I honestly couldn't figure out which gender they were, but I didn't want to be rude and ask, so I took a chance. I unlocked the wrong one. FML

#21056381
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43929) - you deserved it (5213)

On 02/10/2014 at 3:48pm - work - by elizabethkalyn (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42099) - you deserved it (4612)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my car was keyed, while I was still sitting in it. FML

Today, I got back the essay I wrote about how my country's education system is fucked. At one point, I made a spelling mistake. My teacher wrote a note about it, basically calling me illiterate and telling me to pay attention in school instead of whining about it. She misspelled "school". FML

#20990145
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41298) - you deserved it (3925)

On 12/12/2013 at 1:00pm - misc - by lrn2spel, teach (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend told me I'm beautiful. Before I could thank him, he continued, "Too bad it takes a shit-load of makeup." FML

#20986609
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43931) - you deserved it (7086)

On 12/09/2013 at 5:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I woke up and coughed up the spider I thought I'd killed last night. FML

#20986479
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56944) - you deserved it (4845)

On 12/09/2013 at 4:01pm - misc - by igotpride - United States

Today, I lost my phone. I called the number from my friend's phone, hoping I could find it. A guy answered, laughed "Thanks for the phone!" and hung up. FML

#20979337
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46850) - you deserved it (3762)

On 12/03/2013 at 12:54pm - misc - by phonegotlostinthepark - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was rubbing one out in the shower. I guess I got a little too excited, because as I came close to climaxing, I had a serious asthma attack and had to wheeze for help. FML

#20975074
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45748) - you deserved it (11228)

On 11/29/2013 at 7:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)



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