Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

alwaysbored13

Offline (the 10/21/2014 at 12:21pm) | Search for a member

alwaysbored13

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 14 September 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5431
  • Number of comments : 77
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

alwaysbored13's page activity

Visits<b>Voltze</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 9:37pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 9:27am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 7:46pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 7:10am<b>lionqueen1400</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 1:55am<b>MLove02</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 11:52pm<b>Amelia_Jones237</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 6:12pm<b>Dojan</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 10:08pm<b>SlapAndTickle</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 3:22pm<b>iOceanus</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 4:48am<b>Futacy</b> - the 09/25/2012 at 10:58pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:13pm<b>Youdontknowme988</b> - the 12/10/2010 at 1:33am<b>notaboutyou</b> - the 10/27/2010 at 2:11pm<b>0opsie</b> - the 09/13/2010 at 9:04pm<b>brianjman14</b> - the 09/09/2010 at 4:55pm<b>CloudEnvy</b> - the 09/08/2010 at 3:33pm

alwaysbored13's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of alwaysbored13's badges

alwaysbored13's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28048) - you deserved it (5915)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

#19263580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34850) - you deserved it (5451)

On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML

#19262944
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7640) - you deserved it (22886)

On 03/12/2012 at 4:03am - health - by anonymous - United States

Today, I went driving for the first time. I made it twenty miles to my step mom's house, and didn't stop until I was inside the garage. Too bad the garage door was closed when I got there. FML

#19255892
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14661) - you deserved it (14589)

On 03/11/2012 at 5:15am - misc - by meganisabella - United States

Today, in the locker room at work, someone tried writing "douche bag" on my locker, and misspelled it four times before apparently giving up. FML

#19255450
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21619) - you deserved it (1836)

On 03/11/2012 at 1:39am - work - by The Last One (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dropped a knife while cooking. Luckily it missed my foot, but only because it hit my knee. FML

#19254143
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21190) - you deserved it (3804)

On 03/10/2012 at 10:06pm - health - by jmac (man) - United States (California)

Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML

#19253868
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10023) - you deserved it (145808)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm - misc - by Major3 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was half asleep and tried to cuddle my husband as we slept. Still dreaming, he yelled for me to leave his money alone. FML

#19249177
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21384) - you deserved it (4190)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:04am - love - by atsukobo - United States

Today, my best friend informed me that she has been sleeping with my boyfriend. She tried to justify it by saying, "He's just going to break up with you anyway." FML

#19248875
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30959) - you deserved it (1996)

On 03/10/2012 at 12:12am - love - by best friend! - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I angrily tweeted about having fruitlessly searched for over an hour for my car keys. Minutes later, some guy told me to check beneath the "stack of skid-marked underwear" on my bedroom floor. I'm not sure if it was a lucky guess, or if I should start carrying mace. FML

#19247785
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23398) - you deserved it (5741)

On 03/09/2012 at 9:09pm - misc - by skid kid (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I faked being sick so I could weasel out of a chemistry test at school. Happy that I pulled it off, I posted my accomplishment on Facebook. I forgot that I'm friends with my parents. FML

#19245610
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5489) - you deserved it (65746)

On 03/09/2012 at 2:04pm - misc - by KrazyKill - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was given a bottle of vitamins that are supposed to help your memory. I forgot them at home. FML

#19244814
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22752) - you deserved it (3988)

On 03/09/2012 at 10:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I thought it would be funny to scare my dad for once, since he has scared me for fun dozens of times. It would have been funny, had he not punched me in the face. FML

#19244225
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21458) - you deserved it (6614)

On 03/09/2012 at 5:10am - misc - by stupidprankster - United States

Today, I was walking to the bus in my favorite jeans, and I felt a uncontrollable itch in my leg. I scratched and it went away, but then I felt something moving on my leg. I hadn't worn my jeans in so long that a spider had decided to make it a nest. FML

#19244068
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28372) - you deserved it (4016)

On 03/09/2012 at 3:30am - health - by Rissa Warrington - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house for the first time. I cracked a joke that offended her, so she gave me the silent treatment. I had to pee, and since she wouldn't tell me where the bathroom was, I went to look for it. I walked in on her parents making love. FML

#19243836
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39972) - you deserved it (6858)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:59am - intimacy - by banned - United States (California)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: