Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

alstbv12

Search for a member

alstbv12
  • Town/Country : La Jolla
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 31 January 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 1038
  • Number of comments : 133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About alstbv12 :
Yep

alstbv12's last visitors

talkomatic713Joli_Plus_GodSaoneCrookedCookdead_insectsIthedeceiverSoninuvaPalindromesqueNot_Creative

alstbv12's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of alstbv12's badges

alstbv12's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML

#17853519
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28966) - you deserved it (2349)

On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -

Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because I have a cool last name. FML

#17796010
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26370) - you deserved it (3026)

On 09/21/2011 at 2:39pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my mom made me teach my delusional gran web browsing. I barely made it to YouTube before she sneered at me, and told me to "stop pissing about before I smash your face in." Two hours and multiple slaps later, she still doesn't get what a URL is, and I fear for my life. FML

#17783230
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19386) - you deserved it (2226)

On 09/19/2011 at 8:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a lady came into my workplace to pay her $120 bill in one dollar bills. I kept losing count. FML

#17743700
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15618) - you deserved it (8236)

On 09/14/2011 at 11:47am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home to visit my family after a year at college. Expecting to impress them, I proudly informed them that I now speak fluent Swedish. Imagine my surprise when my mother said, "That's a useless language" and everyone agreed. FML

#17682906
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19559) - you deserved it (4855)

On 09/06/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by jag talar (man) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I had to go to the hospital to get a harmonica removed from my mouth. FML

#17675757
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9954) - you deserved it (15968)

On 09/05/2011 at 10:52pm - health - by wheezy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, in a queue to the ATM, a hot girl was standing in front of me. The girl's boyfriend grabbed her ass. She turned around and slapped me. FML

#17620892
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25929) - you deserved it (1829)

On 08/30/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by Zolesz96 (man) - Hungary (Jasz-Nagykun-Szolnok)

Today, in a queue to the ATM, a hot girl was standing in front of me. The girl's boyfriend grabbed her ass. She turned around and slapped me. FML

#17620892
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25929) - you deserved it (1829)

On 08/30/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by Zolesz96 (man) - Hungary (Jasz-Nagykun-Szolnok)

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

#17597780
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21497) - you deserved it (1839)

On 08/27/2011 at 7:06pm - misc - by Revalation - United States

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

#17597780
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21497) - you deserved it (1839)

On 08/27/2011 at 7:06pm - misc - by Revalation - United States

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

#17597780
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21497) - you deserved it (1839)

On 08/27/2011 at 7:06pm - misc - by Revalation - United States

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

#17597780
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21497) - you deserved it (1839)

On 08/27/2011 at 7:06pm - misc - by Revalation - United States



Max Grünfeld's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Worst Sisters Ever
  • Growing up with a sister can be a good thing. If you're a guy, it can teach you about girls and how to interact with them so you won't grow up to be a sexist idiot who's afraid of women and who can only…

Monday 17 June 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: