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alstbv12

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alstbv12

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2032
  • Number of comments : 137
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About alstbv12 :
Yep

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alstbv12's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss called me out for a drug test. His reason was because my eyes are puffy and bloodshot, making me look high. I've been suffering from allergies all week, but still had to pee in a cup in front of a complete stranger. FML

#19225170
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22110) - you deserved it (1823)

On 03/06/2012 at 12:37am - work - by dragynfyre - United States (California)

Today, my boss called me out for a drug test. His reason was because my eyes are puffy and bloodshot, making me look high. I've been suffering from allergies all week, but still had to pee in a cup in front of a complete stranger. FML

#19225170
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22110) - you deserved it (1823)

On 03/06/2012 at 12:37am - work - by dragynfyre - United States (California)

Today, I caught myself yelling at the girl in the porn I was watching for looking at the camera every other second. FML

#19187545
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10330) - you deserved it (34742)

On 02/29/2012 at 5:36am - intimacy - by areyouserious - United States

Today, I received more affection from my wife in a video game than I ever have in real life. FML

#19128091
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23148) - you deserved it (4056)

On 02/21/2012 at 12:01am - love - by bloodshedblack - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was making out with a girl who I've had a crush on for a while now. It was all going fine until one of my teeth decided to dislodge itself. She promptly spat out the tooth and left. FML

#19039187
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29045) - you deserved it (6946)

On 02/10/2012 at 12:40am - misc - by Jarryd - Australia

Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML

#19023656
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33127) - you deserved it (4136)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:17am - love - by daughterofanazi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was texting the guy I like. He's really smart, funny, athletic, and cute. This all changed when he told me he was jacking off. FML

#18956321
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26211) - you deserved it (8318)

On 01/30/2012 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by idrathernotgiveoutmyname (woman) - Canada

Today, while working at a pizza place with my girlfriend, I called my boss to tell him we were short on sausage. Under her breath I heard my girlfriend say, "sounds like somebody I know." FML

#18778131
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33499) - you deserved it (4140)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I heard my alarm go off, dragged myself out of bed, had breakfast and got ready for work. As I was heading out the door I checked the time again. It was 1:41 AM. Apparently my alarm never actually went off. FML

#18520175
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33128) - you deserved it (5690)

On 12/15/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by 2285morgan - United States

Today, my car got stolen. While I was standing ten feet away from it. FML

#18440924
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24451) - you deserved it (6471)

On 12/05/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by smileytheface - United States (Illinois)

Today, during my first date with a girl I've liked for awhile, she tells me about some minor disabilities she was born with. Wanting to be honest with her too, I tell her I'm slightly autistic. Her response was, "I'm sorry this isn't going to work. I can't date a retard." I had to eat alone after that. FML

#17948133
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48771) - you deserved it (3578)

On 10/09/2011 at 11:27pm - love - by DyingPlants (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my car got keyed because I was parked in a handicapped parking spot. I'm handicapped. FML

#17867574
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32061) - you deserved it (2334)

On 09/29/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the boy I like came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML

#17857162
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40711) - you deserved it (2556)

On 09/28/2011 at 5:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML

#17853519
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36228) - you deserved it (2908)

On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -

Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because I have a cool last name. FML

#17796010
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34850) - you deserved it (4227)

On 09/21/2011 at 2:39pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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