alstbv12

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alstbv12

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2258
  • Number of comments : 137
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About alstbv12 :
Yep

alstbv12's page activity

Visits<b>windyouthere</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 3:14pm<b>M3DO</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 2:21am<b>0x48656C6C6F</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:10pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 3:00am<b>msk1155</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 3:29pm<b>brittyboo123</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 12:35am<b>sugoi72</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 5:23pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 11:35am<b>lui_pg</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 3:35am<b>nyf137</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 10:36pm<b>sstahpp</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 11:27am<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 4:28pm<b>balnuaimi</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 11:21pm<b>Xsweglord420x</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 9:52pm<b>shupwhup</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 4:24pm<b>11bGrunT</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 2:34am<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 1:15pm<b>rylaii</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 12:29am

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alstbv12's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2013 at 7:21pm / Canada (Newfoundland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my fiancé is cheating on me. Our wedding is in 26 days and everything is already paid for. FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2012 at 3:34pm / United States / Love

Today, I realized that if I died tomorrow, the only photos available for my funeral would be crappy family Christmas portraits, acne-filled yearbook photos, and several pictures from my MySpace days, where I'm sporting coontails and looking paler than Edward Cullen's ass. FML

by kherien / 08/12/2012 at 1:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, neither of my parents fought for my custody. FML

by Anon / 06/10/2012 at 12:19am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML

by rachiej8 / 06/10/2012 at 12:13am / United States (Vermont) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that the person who has been stalking me has also been stalking someone else. I got upset. It seems it took being stalked to make me feel good about myself. FML

by stalked / 05/28/2012 at 2:24am / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I texted my friend and asked her what her sad status on Facebook was about. She texted me back saying her step-mother had passed away. I tried to reply with "awwh" but my phone autocorrected it to "ahaha." FML

by iPhonekid / 05/27/2012 at 3:19am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was discharged from the hospital after having scrotal surgery. When I got home, the anesthetic had worn off, but I felt okay. Then my dog jumped up at me, paws slamming straight into my nuts. FML

by shanxi / 05/23/2012 at 2:47pm / United States / Health

Today, I entered a hotdog eating contest. I made it up to two, threw up on the rest of them, and fell over. FML

by Weak Disposition / 04/27/2012 at 12:29am / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, while packing my luggage from vacation I thought I saw a penny drop into my bag. After looking everywhere I couldn't find it. Now that I am home I found out that I had mistaken a cockroach for a penny. I now have a family of cockroaches living in my luggage. FML

by penny-dropping / 04/16/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Animals

Today, I realized I've been confusing scenes from The Lord of the Rings with American history. FML

by Avery / 03/24/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, while hiking and wearing sandals, I stubbed my toe. This wouldn't have been so bad had it not been into a cactus with 3 inch thorns. FML

by Anon / 03/23/2012 at 10:42pm / United States / Health

Today, I received my first payment of child support from my estranged husband: $50 and a note that said he wouldn't be paying any more. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2012 at 10:39pm / United States (Virginia) / Money

Today, while on trial for a desperately needed new job, I tripped crossing a road with my would-be manager. I twisted my ankle, and he had to carry me across the road and call a taxi for me to go home. FML

by Katie / 03/09/2012 at 1:48am / United Kingdom / Work