Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (22 hours ago) | Search for a member
About allstarrider : Love reading other peoples misfortunes :) love to play xbox. Currently making sure my paperwork goes well so I can start school finally!!!
P.S. I'm currently working on doing a cover for Rap God (the whole song) so will update when I got it down (wish me luck)
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
Friday 24 October 2014