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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Sunday 21 April 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 810
  • Number of comments : 129
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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allisadawn91's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:20am<b>heartsbball13</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 4:44pm<b>JayElleBee</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 5:09pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 05/08/2013 at 1:50am<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 11:22pm<b>RpiesSPIES</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 11:12pm<b>WhimsicalMusings</b> - the 11/07/2012 at 12:56pm

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allisadawn91's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad told me about how my mother had a bad dream last night and began to scream "Don't take me, take my children!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (67249) - you deserved it (3801)

On 05/20/2009 at 4:49pm - misc - by lm (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my boyfriend texted me saying, "I can come over today. She thinks I've got work." I think he had the wrong number. FML


I agree, your life sucks (83650) - you deserved it (4038)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:46pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML


I agree, your life sucks (515400) - you deserved it (33030)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I'm already a clumsy person but became extra clumsy because I was nervous. After knocking over my drink for the fourth time, my boyfriend's mom angrily shouted "Did you actually come drunk for the first time meeting us?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (68792) - you deserved it (9104)

On 04/03/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by herANDi - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36943) - you deserved it (130926)

On 03/26/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by douchetard (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML


I agree, your life sucks (84655) - you deserved it (8350)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:54pm - misc - by missy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was singing Alicia Keys in the shower and hitting the insanely high notes. My father ran into the bathroom and threw open the shower door, screaming. He thought I was wailing in pain. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19038) - you deserved it (45092)

On 03/02/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by legit (man) - United States (California)

Today, I babysat a five year old girl. She ran up to me, threw her arms around my waist and said, "YUMMY! I'm going to eat you!" with her face in my crotch. I said sarcastically under my breath, "Finally, some action!" I turned around to find her dad staring at me, having heard. He's my cousin. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19241) - you deserved it (89106)

On 02/28/2009 at 5:59am - kids - by tryena (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML


I agree, your life sucks (15903) - you deserved it (71003)

On 02/25/2009 at 1:41pm - work - by foolishgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

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