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alliewillie

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alliewillie

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  • Number of visits : 18062
  • Number of comments : 251
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

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alliewillie's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of alliewillie's badges

alliewillie's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the movie theatre. I went to the bathroom, and was about to wipe my butt when I realized that where the toilet-paper dispenser should have been, there was a large hole. The woman in the next stall waved. FML

#7309178
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26775) - you deserved it (4876)

On 01/12/2010 at 9:57pm - misc - by pass_the_tp (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His mother, seconds upon meeting me, gave me a hug, smiled at me, and said: "It's so nice to finally meet you! All I ever hear is 'Emma this', and 'Emma that', 'I love Emma!'. He never stops talking about you!" My name's not Emma. FML

#7306926
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41404) - you deserved it (2214)

On 01/12/2010 at 8:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML

#7295909
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10940) - you deserved it (37983)

On 01/12/2010 at 5:26am - love - by awkward23 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML

#7295909
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10940) - you deserved it (37983)

On 01/12/2010 at 5:26am - love - by awkward23 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friends let me win at strip poker so I wouldn't take off my clothes. FML

#7293209
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30623) - you deserved it (5774)

On 01/12/2010 at 12:42am - misc - by Absent - France

Today, I found out that a water pipe at my work had burst over the weekend. There is absolutely no water in the building, including the bathrooms. It's a 9 hour day, and I took a laxative this morning before I came in. FML

#7276638
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23689) - you deserved it (9941)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:28am - work - by bs_happens (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was awoken at 1:30am by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML

#7231229
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44332) - you deserved it (2962)

On 01/09/2010 at 3:40am - misc - by Fran (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my sister and I bought new cell phones. We both wanted the same phone in red, but the guy told us that there was only one red phone left. Flirting with him, I said "You should give the prettier sister the red phone." My new phone is black. FML

#7228897
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9728) - you deserved it (38073)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:58am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML

Today, I was texting this guy that I hooked up with yesterday. We were gonna do it again but he had basketball practice. I was talking to my friend about it, and sent her a text saying "Oh well. I have explosive diarrhea anyways." She wasn't replying, so I checked my sent box. I sent it to him. FML

#7209759
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8168) - you deserved it (20489)

On 01/08/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by weeble_wobbles09 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realised that I have fallen for the most amazing girl. She's good looking, has a great personality, she's funny and is a hit with all my friends but she doesn't seem to realise she has a body odor problem. FML

#7207594
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27481) - you deserved it (5688)

On 01/07/2010 at 10:30pm - love - by DDubs (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that while I was on vacation my neighbor had let my brother into my apartment. I don't have a brother. FML

#7203550
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31408) - you deserved it (1704)

On 01/07/2010 at 7:21pm - misc - by Darkness162000 - France

Today, I was watching Free Willy with my boyfriend. It was at the part where the boy leaned into the water to give Willy a hug. I asked, "How do you even hug a whale?" My boyfriend rolled over and gave me a hug, and said, "Like this." FML

#7165792
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36508) - you deserved it (12984)

On 01/05/2010 at 5:03pm - love - by leigh2812 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I learned that my boyfriend waits 'til I am asleep to wack off to porn on the internet. We haven't had sex in months because he doesn't want to. FML

#7158529
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19900) - you deserved it (3308)

On 01/05/2010 at 2:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



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