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alliewillie

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alliewillie

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25211
  • Number of comments : 256
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

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alliewillie's page activity

Visits<b>canadaguy08</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 9:05pm<b>JupiterPainon</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:31pm<b>rachie12435</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:25pm<b>Siimonrogerss</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 12:32am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 10:09pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:23am<b>jesterinperil</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 6:01am<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 10:49pm<b>user109012</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 6:38am<b>Paintonmyarms214</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 1:43pm<b>TPH1979</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:04pm<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 9:55am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 9:05am<b>TheRealRiley</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 8:22am<b>HerpityDerp</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:11pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 4:18am<b>aruden</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 9:33am<b>pugface101</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 7:49pm

Fucked!<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:23pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 10:19am<b>paravoz</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:18am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 5:57am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 10:12am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 5:18am<b>TashyXD101</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 11:56pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:40pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:59am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:47am

alliewillie's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of alliewillie's badges

alliewillie's favorite FMLs

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

#21336619
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32812) - you deserved it (5258)

On 01/13/2015 at 8:50pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I signed into my online class, got bored, and took off my headphones to argue with my roommates about anal sex. At the end of the argument, I put my headphones back on to hear my professor asking if someone could call me to tell me to turn my damn mic off. FML

Today, I was shopping with my dad and I saw one of my guy friends, so we waved and smiled at each other. My dad clearly thought his wave was too "romantic", because he shouted at him, "Touch her, and I'll kill you." FML

#21330296
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32761) - you deserved it (3095)

On 01/03/2015 at 10:56pm - misc - by Dear Lord Save Me (woman) - United Kingdom (Merthyr Tydfil)

Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML

#21329304
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32424) - you deserved it (2460)

On 01/02/2015 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my proposal to my girlfriend was supposed to be exactly when the ball dropped at midnight. Unfortunately my mother called her at 11:55pm to ask her if she liked the ring. FML

#21328278
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40978) - you deserved it (3233)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:47am - love - by Proposal Fail - United States (New York)

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

#21327463
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33333) - you deserved it (2648)

On 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML

#21327404
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27887) - you deserved it (16828)

On 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm - work - by smooth - United States

Today, my oldest friend got engaged to her loving boyfriend of one year. Meanwhile, I can't even get my boyfriend of more than four years to commit to a decision of what he wants for dinner. FML

#21316127
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29976) - you deserved it (4607)

On 12/12/2014 at 10:17am - love - by galladore - United States (Illinois)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

#21315476
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41724) - you deserved it (3121)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend decided to treat me out to dinner and cake for my birthday. My mom felt left out and yelled at my girlfriend in an angry tirade. My girlfriend went home. I'm spending my birthday, alone in my room. FML

#21313391
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32061) - you deserved it (2400)

On 12/07/2014 at 9:18pm - misc - by Haitwun (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend made me a milkshake. It was pale yellow with some black spots. He told me it was banana and poppy seed. After drinking it, he told me they weren't poppy seeds. They were his pubes. FML

#21313388
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38854) - you deserved it (4652)

On 12/07/2014 at 9:12pm - misc - by pubemilkshake - United States (Utah)

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

#21312768
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42324) - you deserved it (2668)

On 12/06/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to dinner at my parents' house. I was going to surprise them by introducing them to my new boyfriend. They decided to surprise me too, by inviting my ex to the dinner. Everyone was surprised tonight. FML

#21312253
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37108) - you deserved it (2858)

On 12/05/2014 at 10:35pm - love - by Michelle - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house to break up with him. When I got there, I got sent on a scavenger hunt that ended with him proposing to me. FML

#21312092
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38972) - you deserved it (6849)

On 12/05/2014 at 4:13pm - love - by hh - United States (South Dakota)

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43332) - you deserved it (3076)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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