Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

alliewillie

Offline (11 hours ago) | Search for a member

alliewillie

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25233
  • Number of comments : 256
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

alliewillie's page activity

Visits<b>Salvanoi</b> - yesterday at 1:02am<b>canadaguy08</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 9:05pm<b>JupiterPainon</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:31pm<b>rachie12435</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:25pm<b>Siimonrogerss</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 12:32am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 10:09pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:23am<b>jesterinperil</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 6:01am<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 10:49pm<b>user109012</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 6:38am<b>Paintonmyarms214</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 1:43pm<b>TPH1979</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:04pm<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 9:55am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 9:05am<b>TheRealRiley</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 8:22am<b>HerpityDerp</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:11pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 4:18am<b>aruden</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 9:33am

Fucked!<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:23pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 10:19am<b>paravoz</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:18am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 5:57am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 10:12am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 5:18am<b>TashyXD101</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 11:56pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:40pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:59am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:47am

alliewillie's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of alliewillie's badges

alliewillie's favorite FMLs

Today, I waited 45 minutes at the Apple Store for my grandpa to very loudly ask why PornHub wasn't loading on his computer. FML

#21448024
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26258) - you deserved it (1885)

On 07/27/2015 at 12:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I had a dream about a giant spider crawling around in my mouth. I woke up to find that dreams sometimes do come true. FML

#21445902
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28586) - you deserved it (1807)

On 07/23/2015 at 9:05am - animals - by dirtbikeguy (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was at home watching Netflix, my parents drunkenly stumbled through the door making out the whole time. I thought that the situation couldn't get worse, but then my Dad asked me if I had a condom they could use. FML

Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML

#21445392
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25832) - you deserved it (3125)

On 07/22/2015 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend's dad helped me put coolant in my car. When I said I wished I could do something in return, he told me to get an abortion so I wouldn't "ruin" his son's life. When I told my boyfriend, he didn't believe me. FML

#21444969
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26944) - you deserved it (2510)

On 07/21/2015 at 11:17am - misc - by father-in-nope (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while in the waiting room at the dentist's office, I looked up at the news on the TV to see my husband's mugshot. FML

#21443899
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27262) - you deserved it (2038)

On 07/19/2015 at 5:02am - misc - by wtf did he do - United States (Alaska)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be hilarious to secretly swap her and my mom's numbers in my phone, then sexually tease me before going to work. I found out about the prank when I texted my "girlfriend", saying I was going to fuck her so hard she wouldn't walk straight for days. FML

#21443815
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30903) - you deserved it (4281)

On 07/19/2015 at 12:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML

#21442166
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31520) - you deserved it (3069)

On 07/15/2015 at 6:02pm - misc - by Razz - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33716) - you deserved it (2466)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realised that my boyfriend gets a boner every time I cry. FML

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML

#21439825
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27742) - you deserved it (2387)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by Julianapilikusplatosophophes (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my wife was in seemingly never-ending labor. It got so bad, I overheard a nurse in the doorway mutter to a coworker that she hoped my baby would just die or something, so she could finally go take a smoke break. FML

#21439756
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35575) - you deserved it (1699)

On 07/10/2015 at 9:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a week after my miscarriage, my little sister thought it appropriate to wrap her belt around her neck and scream, "Hey look, it's your baby!" FML

#21438976
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39358) - you deserved it (2167)

On 07/09/2015 at 10:38am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months was showing me his new phone. He accidentally opened his gallery, which contains 3 photos: one of his motorcycle, one of his new game console, and a naked photo of his ex. FML

#21436861
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24514) - you deserved it (1832)

On 07/05/2015 at 3:18pm - love - by wellthatsucks - United States



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: