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alliewillie

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alliewillie

7Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 18108
  • Number of comments : 251
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

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alliewillie's page activity

Visits<b>IMcPwn</b> - 12 hours ago<b>sexymomo1234</b> - 24 hours ago<b>enginsteve</b> - yesterday at 2:38am<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - yesterday at 10:37am<b>sylverdrag</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 8:15am<b>simon70</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 8:03am<b>MortenM</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 6:09am<b>robertd73</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 12:31am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 11:56pm<b>wvcheesehead</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 11:06pm<b>Scryll</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 10:10pm<b>bluegreenfml</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 7:16pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:47pm<b>Hawx07</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:08pm<b>tbloom</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:52pm<b>stully99</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:39pm<b>biogineer</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 12:08pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 11:27am

Liked!<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 5:57am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 10:12am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 5:18am<b>TashyXD101</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 11:56pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:40pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:59am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:47am

alliewillie's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of alliewillie's badges

alliewillie's favorite FMLs

Today, it's been 3 months since my dog scratched my 9 year old granddaughter after she walked over and repeatedly kicked him. My daughter has disowned me and won't let me see my own grandchildren until I have my companion of 11 years "destroyed". FML

#21343453
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28826) - you deserved it (1987)

On 01/24/2015 at 1:33pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Giurgiu)

Today, I caught my girlfriend Googling how to uninstall Siri. I asked why she wanted to do that, and she said, "I don't like it. I don't like how the slut talks to you." I get the feeling I'll need a gun when I break up with this crazy fucker. FML

#21342067
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31032) - you deserved it (4511)

On 01/22/2015 at 1:41am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was playing Charades. My boyfriend, who I'd recently had a fight with, had trouble and just said his answer was the name of my celebrity twin. Nobody got it. He said "Really? It's Fat Bastard." Stunned silence followed, broken by a single "HAH." from my 'best friend'. FML

#21340816
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28296) - you deserved it (3364)

On 01/20/2015 at 6:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

#21336619
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31611) - you deserved it (4955)

On 01/13/2015 at 8:50pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I signed into my online class, got bored, and took off my headphones to argue with my roommates about anal sex. At the end of the argument, I put my headphones back on to hear my professor asking if someone could call me to tell me to turn my damn mic off. FML

Today, I was shopping with my dad and I saw one of my guy friends, so we waved and smiled at each other. My dad clearly thought his wave was too "romantic", because he shouted at him, "Touch her, and I'll kill you." FML

#21330296
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30450) - you deserved it (2781)

On 01/03/2015 at 10:56pm - misc - by Dear Lord Save Me (woman) - United Kingdom (Merthyr Tydfil)

Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML

#21329304
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30071) - you deserved it (2167)

On 01/02/2015 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my proposal to my girlfriend was supposed to be exactly when the ball dropped at midnight. Unfortunately my mother called her at 11:55pm to ask her if she liked the ring. FML

#21328278
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40357) - you deserved it (3199)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:47am - love - by Proposal Fail - United States (New York)

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

#21327463
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33132) - you deserved it (2636)

On 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML

#21327404
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26584) - you deserved it (15570)

On 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm - work - by smooth - United States

Today, my oldest friend got engaged to her loving boyfriend of one year. Meanwhile, I can't even get my boyfriend of more than four years to commit to a decision of what he wants for dinner. FML

#21316127
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28117) - you deserved it (4100)

On 12/12/2014 at 10:17am - love - by galladore - United States (Illinois)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

#21315476
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39154) - you deserved it (2685)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend decided to treat me out to dinner and cake for my birthday. My mom felt left out and yelled at my girlfriend in an angry tirade. My girlfriend went home. I'm spending my birthday, alone in my room. FML

#21313391
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31880) - you deserved it (2389)

On 12/07/2014 at 9:18pm - misc - by Haitwun (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend made me a milkshake. It was pale yellow with some black spots. He told me it was banana and poppy seed. After drinking it, he told me they weren't poppy seeds. They were his pubes. FML

#21313388
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36909) - you deserved it (4332)

On 12/07/2014 at 9:12pm - misc - by pubemilkshake - United States (Utah)

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

#21312768
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39910) - you deserved it (2249)

On 12/06/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

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