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allie2590

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allie2590

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 February 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 35534
  • Number of comments : 531
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About allie2590 : I'm the happiest snake of all!

allie2590's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 3:33pm<b>jessicadani</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 10:11pm<b>samthestud13</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 10:19pm<b>katrynaalyse</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:49pm<b>Sexomancer</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:03pm<b>ofeofe</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 10:04pm<b>zieelona</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 5:17am<b>itzypedia</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 11:48am<b>horseh</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 9:56pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 6:00pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 7:33pm<b>Afroninja4566</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:16pm<b>abNormal62</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 11:58am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 3:43am<b>potatosex5</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 11:11am<b>anonymous_guy32</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 1:55pm<b>Totalninja301</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 2:06pm<b>ma12r</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 9:01am

Fucked!<b>jessicadani</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:11am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 9:43am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 9:23pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 8:33pm<b>waitwhatsgoingon</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 6:25am<b>pennyprostitute</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 5:06am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:41pm<b>Random_Princess</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:43am<b>cjwayy</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 4:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:44am<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:35am

allie2590's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of allie2590's badges

allie2590's favorite FMLs

Today, it's the third day of my dad's revenge after he snapped over me supposedly using the word "duh" in every other sentence. He got his hands on my old recorder and has been playing it loudly and out of tune outside my room when I try to do my homework. My mom thinks this is hilarious. FML

#18083556
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19658) - you deserved it (13152)

On 10/26/2011 at 8:24pm - misc - by krystal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML

#18044688
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22845) - you deserved it (16854) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/22/2011 at 8:40am - kids - by titoutou222 - France

Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML

#18010067
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30736) - you deserved it (3663)

On 10/17/2011 at 9:14pm - work - by number2 - United States

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

#17848518
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46746) - you deserved it (3596)

On 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep and completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32056) - you deserved it (3063)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, while paying for groceries, I opened my wallet to find that all my cash had been exchanged for Monopoly money. FML

#17598415
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33861) - you deserved it (2815)

On 08/27/2011 at 8:38pm - money - by KayDayParade - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help me get over the fear of my upcoming rectal exam by surprising me with one of her own halfway through our lovemaking. FML

#17577684
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29524) - you deserved it (4560)

On 08/25/2011 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by shocked (man) - United States

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

#17564993
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37519) - you deserved it (3289)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)

Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML

#17555349
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29360) - you deserved it (2515)

On 08/23/2011 at 3:14am - misc - by kykynevs - United States (Illinois)

Today, after a tennis lesson, the coach was picking up the stray tennis balls around the court. Trying to be helpful, I asked him, "Do you want me to grab your ball bag?" His eyeballs almost burst out of their sockets. FML

#17512926
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28182) - you deserved it (7723)

On 08/18/2011 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by BigmouthStrikesAgain (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML

#17455521
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38220) - you deserved it (14387)

On 08/13/2011 at 12:06am - love - by sydneybourgeois - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that on his last visit, he snuck into the laundry and stole a lacy black thong he assumed was mine. It wasn't. It was my dad's. FML

#17380404
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36501) - you deserved it (3522)

On 08/05/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, a fight broke out in a bar between several people, over some talk about one of their moms being somewhat inclined towards intercourse with her pets. I managed to slip out quietly with just a scratch from flying chair debris, despite having started the rumor. FML

#17376503
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7386) - you deserved it (61383)

On 08/05/2011 at 10:05am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML

#17344218
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32175) - you deserved it (2905)

On 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by scully11 (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

#17338945
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51413) - you deserved it (9870)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)



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