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aljop

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aljop

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 28 September 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 367
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About aljop : Football player, track runner, boxer. Freshmen.

aljop's page activity

Visits<b>lord_farqwad</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 8:58pm<b>bryonyb33</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 4:37am<b>Syncronisis</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 3:48pm<b>HeadlessSparrow</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 2:04pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 1:04pm<b>GeorgeCarter95</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 11:24am<b>ShadowClone27</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 1:22am<b>loveestt</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 3:08pm<b>Queen_bee1234</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 7:51am<b>jcroisdale</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 3:38pm<b>cmonger</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 3:46pm<b>thisguy184</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 10:26pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 8:02am<b>jfkdjfnnfjchn</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 10:05pm<b>thatADHDdude</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 1:49pm<b>sneeks</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 12:30pm<b>christiine_k</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 7:20pm<b>samdog45</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 2:32pm

aljop's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of aljop's badges

aljop's favorite FMLs

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

#21365242
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17196) - you deserved it (51221)

On 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

#21360688
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33422) - you deserved it (7925)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm - misc - by wife - United States (California)

Today, I went to my son's school soccer game. Unfortunately, I couldn't get excited about it because my idiot son kept diving the moment anyone so much as breathed on him. It eventually earned him a penalty shot that won him the game. I was so ashamed, I snuck out to avoid being seen with him. FML

#21358080
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30253) - you deserved it (9044)

On 02/17/2015 at 3:02pm - kids - by Clive81 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that honestly answering "yes" to "Are Kate Upton's boobs bigger than mine?" is in my girlfriend's mind the equivalent of saying I don't find her attractive anymore and that I want to break up with her to date a supermodel. FML

#21355268
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27591) - you deserved it (7062)

On 02/13/2015 at 9:54am - love - by StrawHatBill (man) - United States

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

#21354315
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18680) - you deserved it (35471)

On 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm - misc - by SDCore (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a homeless guy tried to light my hair on fire with a match at the bus stop. FML

#21342118
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29286) - you deserved it (2215)

On 01/22/2015 at 5:40am - misc - by burningman (man) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML

#21341327
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28771) - you deserved it (10526)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:10pm - intimacy - by chelse_elyce - United States

Today, my mom paid me a surprise visit me at my university dorm. She ended up rifling through my stuff and started to pull out a box from on top of my wardrobe. Before I could stop her, it slipped and fell. Today's forecast: 100% chance of dildo rain. FML

#21338507
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31782) - you deserved it (4515)

On 01/16/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking with a female friend when suddenly, my ex-girlfriend comes running down the street and says, "So, you're cheating on me with this slut, huh?!" We've been separated for a decade now. FML

#21336664
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35941) - you deserved it (2539)

On 01/13/2015 at 10:05pm - love - by RipeFlame - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32724) - you deserved it (2532)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I sat on the bus for 3 hours stuck in traffic trying to ignore the old lady sitting next to me discreetly masturbating. FML

Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML

#21314442
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32416) - you deserved it (5315)

On 12/09/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my boyfriend made me a milkshake. It was pale yellow with some black spots. He told me it was banana and poppy seed. After drinking it, he told me they weren't poppy seeds. They were his pubes. FML

#21313388
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36947) - you deserved it (4336)

On 12/07/2014 at 9:12pm - misc - by pubemilkshake - United States (Utah)

Today, at the fast food joint I work at, I had to climb into the children's play area and chase out two horny teens who thought it was an appropriate place to stick their hands down each other's pants and fool around. I don't get paid enough for this shit. FML

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

#21286701
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26272) - you deserved it (34420)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Indiana)



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