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aliyourpally

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aliyourpally
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 19 January 1998 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1043
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About aliyourpally : Hi :D

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aliyourpally's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28756) - you deserved it (133742)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, when I was walking in to the grocery store, a van pulls up and a bunch of guys get out who look really drunk. I jokingly said to the sober-looking man who had driven the van "Sucks you have to be the designated driver!" Turns out the "Drunk" guys were actually mentally challenged. FML

#1178108
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12010) - you deserved it (57962)

On 04/20/2009 at 11:14pm - misc - by dummy441 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was working at a portrait studio and was taking pictures of a little girl, I kept telling the girl to stop making silly faces when she smiles because her eyes go cross-eyed. After the third time I said it her mom grabbed the little girl and left. Turns out, she was naturally cross-eyed. FML

#852242
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18692) - you deserved it (50218)

On 04/07/2009 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was swimming in the ocean, not too far off shore. I had asked my mom to come in, but she was afraid of the water because fish had nipped at her toes or something back in the day. I told her there was nothing to fear. I ended up getting stung in the balls by a Jelly fish. FML

#566984
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64260) - you deserved it (9575)

On 03/23/2009 at 10:48pm - misc - by The_HML - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up at my grandparents house since my mom was out of town, still half asleep i went to brush my teeth. Mid brush my mouth started getting numb I looked again at the tooth paste I used..turns out it was my grandpa's anti-itch anal cream. FML

#245062
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57217) - you deserved it (16001)

On 03/08/2009 at 7:57pm - misc - by poop - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was getting restless in my psychology class. I stretched out both of my arms and hands into the aisles on either side of me, only to find myself with my teacher's package in my palm. FML

#221639
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42912) - you deserved it (9376)

On 03/05/2009 at 9:29pm - misc - by dizzlewizzle - United States (New York)

Today, there was a story called "Looking Good" about fashion in school that ran in the local newspaper. On the front page of that section it featured a picture of my class. I was photoshopped out. FML

#218280
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59705) - you deserved it (4041)

On 03/05/2009 at 4:36pm - misc - by failout (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

#9438
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43976) - you deserved it (13049)

On 02/05/2009 at 8:23am - animals - by #201 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked past a girl in the cafeteria and she threw up. Naturally, a crowd was drawn. Her friend asked her what was wrong. She pointed at me and said, "Get him away from me!" I had never met this girl. FML

#7894
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33883) - you deserved it (1651)

On 02/04/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by disgusting (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML

#4044
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8395) - you deserved it (40685)

On 01/31/2009 at 9:43am - intimacy - by Ah hell - United States (Ohio)

Today, taking the train to work after the worst hangover ever, two immense fat women start talking about rim jobs. I got up to switch cabins just in time for their conversation to switch over to RECEIVING rim jobs. I sprayed puke all over myself and an innocent bystander. FML

#857
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17750) - you deserved it (3177)

On 01/08/2009 at 6:21am - health - by depraved - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, well, last night, I told my girlfriend that I'm a light sleeper, and that the slightest disturbance will wake me up. As a result, this morning when I looked in the mirror I noticed a bunch of stuff written all over my body, like "You see, you didn't wake up!", "Nor now!". FML

#703
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6451) - you deserved it (25289)

On 01/04/2009 at 10:33pm - love - by titou - Sent from mobile version

Today, the real estate guy came with potential buyers to visit my house. He opened my bedroom while I was wanking. FML

#22
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47199) - you deserved it (34889)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:31am - intimacy - by rmL -



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