About aliciaanomalyyxo : I'm awesome.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28933) - you deserved it (11759)
On 03/21/2013 at 6:01am - intimacy - by meeee (woman) - United States
Today, at a science-fiction convention, a woman came up to me and told me that my white face paint was a mess, my contacts looked cheap, and my costume was an all-round failure. I wasn't wearing a costume, I'm an albino. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38075) - you deserved it (1903)
On 03/19/2013 at 10:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37255) - you deserved it (14783)
On 03/19/2013 at 8:31am - intimacy - by fredo (man) - United States (Iowa)
Today, as always, I'm dating one of the few girls who, without fail, always finishes first when we get intimate. She's also one of those girlfriends who doesn't want to continue once she's done. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34846) - you deserved it (4886)
On 03/13/2013 at 3:51pm - intimacy - by WhyDoINeedAName - Canada (Alberta)
Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36069) - you deserved it (7332)
On 03/10/2013 at 9:40am - intimacy - by cremyfrozentreat - United States (Florida)
Today, my 20-year-old came whining to me, asking why his job interviews keep going so poorly. I had to delicately explain that the "PIMP SLAP" tattoo he had put on his right hand recently may have something to do with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23226) - you deserved it (2722)
On 03/06/2013 at 1:04pm - kids - by ProudMother (woman) - United Kingdom (Telford and Wrekin)
Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34681) - you deserved it (3336)
On 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm - kids - by cjw - United States
Today, my car got rear ended by a driver with an "I brake for squirrels" bumper sticker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19540) - you deserved it (1356)
On 03/05/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by MoonBunny - United States (Florida)
Today, I took a week off work because my father passed away. I was at the funeral home making arrangements when I overheard the owners complaining about how their insurance agent had left them to fend for themselves. I'm their insurance agent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22802) - you deserved it (2040)
On 03/04/2013 at 10:38pm - work - by KathleenSchuler - United States
Today, my boyfriend told me I was selfish for "choosing" to start my period on his day off from work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40179) - you deserved it (3917)
On 03/04/2013 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by Thankshun (woman) - United States
Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38100) - you deserved it (4754)
On 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm - misc - by parental failure (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was at my class's band concert. Before the curtain was raised, I helped haul the piano to a different spot so a girl who would've had to stand behind it could be seen. I said, "There, now your mom can see you play!" She responded with, "My mom's blind." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27944) - you deserved it (2622)
On 03/02/2013 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML
I agree, your life sucks (49872) - you deserved it (4405)
On 03/01/2013 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by sn-511 (man) - Italy (Campania)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because he didn't trust himself not to cheat on me. What? FML
I agree, your life sucks (29919) - you deserved it (2763)
On 03/01/2013 at 7:02am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25124) - you deserved it (2232)
On 02/26/2013 at 3:21am - health - by Brook (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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