About aliciaanomalyyxo : I'm awesome.
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aliciaanomalyyxo's favorite FMLs
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 1:54am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by saddened97 / 01/20/2011 at 4:39am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
by Brokeashell / 06/01/2010 at 2:47pm / United States / Money
by PanFace / 10/13/2009 at 2:54am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, I caught my little brother peeping at my friend getting dressed in the bathroom. When I asked him what he was doing he said "I'm just doing what Ray does to you while you're in the bathroom." Ray is my new step dad. FML
by Nicole / 07/07/2009 at 8:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML
by Alex / 03/26/2009 at 12:42am / United States (Georgia) / Kids
Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML
by Scottrick / 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids
by FractalSanity / 02/01/2009 at 3:11am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, I had sex with my fiancée. My panties fell behind the bed. Later, when I went to get them, I… Today, I had to give a speech in front of my class and during my speech I had to say the words "But… Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a…