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alice_in_mordor

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alice_in_mordor

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1735
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About alice_in_mordor : ....

alice_in_mordor's page activity

Visits<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 7:17pm<b>pkts11</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 7:15pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 8:36pm<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 2:22pm<b>TheWiseWolf</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 10:55pm<b>Cacksonic</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 10:08pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 6:43am<b>PairofSocks</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 11:09pm<b>manda_xD</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 2:37pm<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 2:45pm<b>medic8</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 2:17pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 7:06pm<b>buckeyefan16</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 12:30am<b>TheIlluminatii</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 7:34pm<b>woiz</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:40am<b>tapin360</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 9:03am<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 1:33pm<b>kaliande</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 11:26am

Liked!<b>cameronaka</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 4:50am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:35am<b>devildog562</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 6:24am

alice_in_mordor's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of alice_in_mordor's badges

alice_in_mordor's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML

#19703392
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36713) - you deserved it (8858)

On 05/30/2012 at 5:46am - intimacy - by Brax (man) - United States

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

#19702897
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30801) - you deserved it (7439)

On 05/30/2012 at 1:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13205) - you deserved it (41481)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

#19450302
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9535) - you deserved it (33407)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)

Today, while walking to work, I swore I saw one of my old friends from college standing in the park across the street. I started shouting her name and waving my hands like a maniac to get her attention. It was a statue. FML

#19447038
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9520) - you deserved it (22663)

On 04/10/2012 at 11:49pm - misc - by Becca (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47288) - you deserved it (4609)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I watched Gigli. FML

#19259305
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7891) - you deserved it (25419)

On 03/11/2012 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I received numerous text messages from my parents asking where I was and how worried they are. I was in my room, they didn't even notice me walk in. FML

#18742871
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (2673)

On 01/08/2012 at 2:24am - misc - by musicislife1337 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my parents were coming to visit me at my brand new apartment. I made dinner and served them the cake my roomate had left for me in the fridge. Thirty minutes after they left, I was so baked that I couldn't think straight. I still don't know if my parents made it home. FML

#18579511
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29972) - you deserved it (7658)

On 12/22/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by Cookie (woman) - South Africa

Today, I gave my boyfriend the silent treatment. He put his Facebook status as "When your girlfriend finally shuts up for once". FML

#18287242
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16042) - you deserved it (41478)

On 11/19/2011 at 6:42am - love - by kaybax - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML

#18041675
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20347) - you deserved it (33720)

On 10/21/2011 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while leaving a football game, I saw a half-empty bottle of Mountain Dew on the ground. It was night-time and there weren't many people around, so for a laugh, I picked it up and tossed it behind me as hard as I could. It hit someone. FML

#18008863
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6831) - you deserved it (47968)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I overheard my parents planning on how to get me to move out of the house. It's my house. They only came to visit and forgot to leave. FML

#17668711
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38634) - you deserved it (2784)

On 09/05/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31500) - you deserved it (3511)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States

Today, I told my five year old daughter that no, she could not have ice cream for breakfast. She retaliated by pooping in the living room and smearing it on the walls. My in-laws, whom I've been trying to impress for ages, are visiting today. FML

#16746008
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33457) - you deserved it (6780)

On 06/19/2011 at 2:03pm - kids - by screwedwoman27 - United States



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