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alibear7

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alibear7
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1701
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About alibear7 : I'm cool shit.
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alibear7's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking the subway to school. It was around 6:30am and I was listening to music and catching up on homework. When I took my headphones off to readjust them, I heard some grunting. I looked over at the man across from me to see he was masturbating. FML

#256186
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63978) - you deserved it (2935)

On 03/09/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by danesy - United States (New York)

Today, I had a job interview. I stopped to take a pee in the lobby before I went in. I relaxed a bit too much at the urinal and accidentally farted. I chuckled about it like a 5-year old for a few seconds. The guy that had been next to me at the urinal was the interviewer. FML

#253814
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17601) - you deserved it (40687)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:45pm - work - by ADH2000 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was so drunk that my friends put me to bed during a party. Later I find out that while I was passed out two of my friends came in and had sex while I was in the same bed. They tried to use me as a prop. Now my friends call me the love wedge. FML

#245374
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59845) - you deserved it (18350)

On 03/08/2009 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by lovewedge (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at the restaurant where I work, I served a table of 4 middle-age women. Before greeting the table, I was deciding between saying "Can I get you anything to drink?" and "Can I start you off with something?" My actual greeting? "Can I get you ladies off?" FML

#243465
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40244) - you deserved it (17036)

On 03/08/2009 at 5:02pm - misc - by serverdessert - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was walking along the street and passed a young couple. Over my shoulder I heard the girl say to her boyfriend "Would you still love me if I looked like her?" FML

#232729
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (154666) - you deserved it (9282)

On 03/07/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by Pissed Off (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was sitting on my 70 year old grandmothers bed with my older brother. I decided to snoop through the cabinet at the back of her bed, and I pulled out what I naively thought was a strange looking flashlight. When I twisted the bottom of it to see what would happen it started vibrating. FML

#232314
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21336) - you deserved it (62556)

On 03/07/2009 at 2:35am - intimacy - by You Wish (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

#209116
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (218545) - you deserved it (28159)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to visit my fiancé's dying grandmother in the hospital with him. She started talking to us about living each day to the fullest. His grandmother points to me and says, "Life is short. That's why you don't waste any time screwing girls who look like that." FML

#197015
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64014) - you deserved it (2877)

On 03/03/2009 at 4:36pm - misc - by joAnne (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend was coming over so I bought this sexy corset, some fishnets, stilettos and see-through thong. After my dad left I dressed up and a few minutes later the doorbell rang. I answered it, whip in hand. It was my dad. He forgot his keys. I'm grounded. FML

#170978
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40280) - you deserved it (132815)

On 03/01/2009 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by thissucks (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mother got a call from our old high school saying that they had fifteen freshmen boys in his office with a nude photo of me on their phones. I had sent that photo only to my boyfriend. Apparently he loves to share me. FML

#167901
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25903) - you deserved it (78851)

On 03/01/2009 at 1:58am - intimacy - by fmlisthebomb (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1094929) - you deserved it (108818)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML

#121139
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64503) - you deserved it (16983)

On 02/24/2009 at 2:31am - intimacy - by addictedtofml (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was talking to my crush about making the soccer team. Excited, he congratulated me and asked for my number. I gave him my cellphone number. He laughed and said "your jersey number". FML

#101947
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36301) - you deserved it (9741)

On 02/22/2009 at 2:24am - love - by 987564 (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I was home alone tanning in my backyard which is fairly secluded. I took my top off and laid there for awhile before I looked over and saw the UPS guy standing at my gate with a package because nobody answered the door. I looked horrified and he said not to worry, he'd seen better. FML

#70171
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39282) - you deserved it (7486)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by mediocreboobs (woman) - United States (California)



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