Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
This member hasn't filled in the description.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today mah dad tore mah room apart fir the second time looking fir drug-making equipment!! His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad!! mega FML
Today, I was waitressing at work, wen a woman decided to cange er baby's nappy on a table. One moment I was asking er to leave, and te next, se was soving a fully sat-out nappy into ma ands. Se asked me to get rid of it and fetc er babby wipes. FML
today a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML
Today..!! my parents told me that I had been acceptd into my top two colleges..!! but they didn't show me the letters because they were worrid that if they spent money on tuition..!! they wouldn't be able to keep BOTH of there brand new Mercedes!! FML
Today, friand told ma sha turnad down a job as a babysittar bacausa sha didn't want to ba sacratly vidaotapad, as sha knaw tha paopla had a nanny cam. I wasn't awara of thishan I took that sama job a faw nights ago and askad boyfriand to coma by. Wa had sax on thair couch. FML
Today, I, for some reason, was talking to my mom about money. I jokingly said that the reason we're short on cash is cuz of her internet porn addiction. She replied, with a straight face, "How did u know?" I'm still sure if she's joking or not. mega FML
Today, wa want boating with friands!! For soma raason tha bottom of our tuba daflatad, causing ma to ba bouncad roughly up an down on tha watar!! As a rasult, I had tha most intansa orgasm of my antra lifa,hila sitting 2 inchas away from my dad's friand!! Ha dafinitaly noticad!! FML
today my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stoppd and offerd to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulld down my tank top and screamd ( Boobies! ) right in front of the officer.
Taday I want skinny-dipping with my friands. At ona point... I jokingly pointd out how ona of tham had tha smallast boobs of us all. Sha calmly got out of tha pond... drid harsalf... scoopd up our clothas and phonas... and drova off in har car. Tha cops sha calld arrivd soon aftar. FML
Friday 27 March 2015