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alexmisty88

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alexmisty88

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 160
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 11 posted

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alexmisty88's page activity

Visits<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 8:16am<b>Mads_1234</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 11:37am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 4:38pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:51am<b>kowbrainz</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:19pm<b>sacrosanct2</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 5:56am<b>zachhewett</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:19am<b>annapanda143</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 11:56pm<b>Canadianpetowner</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 6:15pm<b>TheTwerkCapt</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 8:59pm<b>how_about_no_</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 7:05pm<b>VladPutin666</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 3:19pm<b>chase201</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 10:24am<b>leannestar</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 4:45pm<b>Wheatbreadman</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 9:00am<b>grandtheftautumn</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 9:35am<b>Haiitzmizzy</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:02am<b>abbie99c</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 6:50pm

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alexmisty88's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12723) - you deserved it (24543)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35195) - you deserved it (21262)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, I lost my wedding ring at work. It wouldn't be too hard to track down, except that I work at Heinz. If you find it in your mayonnaise, keep it. FML

Today, I was at a party, and someone called the cops on us. I dove into a bush that turned out to have thorns. I got multiple cuts and a sprained wrist, and got arrested anyway. Its kind of hard to hide from the police when you're screaming in agony. FML

#21213929
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38239) - you deserved it (24259)

On 07/19/2014 at 7:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I watched a Youtube video about artists who ripped off other artist's songs. All of the bands that were accused of stealing were all bands that I really enjoy. FML

#21194507
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34648) - you deserved it (9764)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:12am - misc - by dillon (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I got written up for asking my coworker a question that I should have asked my boss to ask my coworker. Yay bureaucracy. FML

#21159568
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39022) - you deserved it (3701)

On 06/01/2014 at 5:03pm - work - by not paid enough (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

Today, I ran out of toilet paper. I yelled from the bathroom for my parents to bring me some toilet paper. My dad slipped one tiny piece of toilet paper under the door and boomed, "THE FINAL TEST." FML

#21058095
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38586) - you deserved it (5128)

On 02/12/2014 at 12:57pm - misc - by airhead2015 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had to skip class to attend a truancy court hearing. FML

#21027645
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33591) - you deserved it (16691)

On 01/14/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML

#21024175
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45848) - you deserved it (5176)

On 01/11/2014 at 12:55am - love - by rollergirl13 - United States (Alaska)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43226) - you deserved it (5249)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

#20919376
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52342) - you deserved it (3292)

On 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by mustabeendrugs (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, at work as a cashier, I was scanning cantaloupes. The man buying them then looked me straight in the eye and said, "Nice melons." FML

#20900810
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33888) - you deserved it (4428)

On 09/29/2013 at 5:12pm - work - by Nice Melons (woman) - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54974) - you deserved it (64081)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)



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