alexmisty88

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Offline (the 03/09/2016 at 10:18pm)

alexmisty88

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1559
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 19 posted

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alexmisty88's page activity

Visits<b>swervelol</b> - the 11/18/2016 at 3:15pm<b>nickinoodle</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 2:53am<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 2:05pm<b>dno79</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 3:42pm<b>Swarlis</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 9:57am<b>Jrsmommy2014</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 12:17pm<b>Elainacs</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:01pm<b>__doge__</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 9:16am<b>ExtremeEncounter</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 2:47pm<b>rhiley</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 12:44am<b>whitechick305</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 2:16pm<b>larrypoppins</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 3:38pm<b>Soccersensation</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 5:29pm<b>Shane557</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 2:40am<b>joco4</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 6:32am<b>rootbeercheese8</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 8:50pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 11:00pm<b>whoopydoodah</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 12:57am

Fucked!<b>rhiley</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 6:44am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 2:49pm

alexmisty88's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of alexmisty88's badges

alexmisty88's favorite FMLs

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

by Bex98 / 01/11/2016 at 3:17am / United States (California) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, one of my customers told me he was going to kill himself when I explained to him that I wasn't going to be able to deliver him the gallon of milk he wanted. I work in a pharmacy, dispensing medication. FML

by HeatherFeatherB / 01/04/2016 at 10:27pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, my dad got drunk and decided to fix everything in the house he thought was broken. Now the oven won't cook, half the floorboards from the stairs are piled in the garden, we put the TV back together but now it is stuck on mute, and we still have no idea where he has put my bedroom door. FML

by bob the builders pissed off daughter / 12/29/2015 at 6:52pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally realized the toll working as a cashier 5 days a week during the holidays does to your psyche. I just said "Welcome To Walgreens", out of pure reflex, to my cat as she walked into my kitchen. FML

Today, my boyfriend backed out on our date so he could help his best friend get ready for some kind of drag queen competition. FML

by strictly cum prancing / 12/11/2015 at 2:48pm / United States / Love

Today, I gave a group presentation. Because I didn't know the last names of my group members, I'd put fake ones in, intending to replace them later. I forgot to change them and I ended up giving a presentation alongside a very angry Greg Penishead and Josh Acne. FML

by friendless1004 / 11/12/2015 at 11:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, a student set me on fire while I was lecturing my class about proper lab safety. FML

by burnbabyburn / 11/11/2015 at 12:47pm / United Kingdom / Work

Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML

by horp / 09/29/2015 at 6:00pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, I accidentally threw a glass of iced tea in my own face, because the restaurant I'd patronized for over a decade switched from heavy glass mugs to identical light-as-a-feather plastic mugs. FML

by BlueMacaw / 09/16/2015 at 2:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my drill sergeant was yelling at me and asking me questions. I got a question wrong, and he asked me if I am a "Shit Sandwich". I replied "Yes sir, with extra cheese." I'm running miles till the day I die. FML

by BarhydtBran / 08/17/2015 at 9:55pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to the lovely sounds of goats having escaped their pen and climbed onto the roof. Again. FML

by MisUnFortunate / 12/16/2014 at 1:42pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

by royallymessedup / 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm / Love

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

by drunk under 18 teenager / 08/19/2014 at 9:37am / Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz) / Geek

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy