About alexmac222 : My name is Alex and I'm from Phoenix, Arizona. I'm an avid FMyLife reader. :)
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
alexmac222's favorite FMLs
Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML
by Anonomous / 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals
by Cacahuete / 12/28/2013 at 9:46am / Miscellaneous
by honeybunny90 / 12/28/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by Anonymous / 12/28/2013 at 12:10am / United States (Michigan) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 7:05pm / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Animals
Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML
by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, I discovered the real reason my husband was distraught last week and has been acting moodily ever since. An attractive girl he was secretly having sex chats with online confessed to him that "she" was actually a guy. FML
by -__- / 12/27/2013 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 3:18pm / Jamaica (Saint Andrew) / Intimacy
by anon / 12/27/2013 at 2:28am / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous
Today, as I was driving back home from my grandma's, I looked over at the guy in the lane beside me, only to witness him with a sandwich between his teeth and his cock in his free hand. Now I know why I don't leave the city, or even drive, more often. FML
by NNTA / 12/26/2013 at 6:21pm / Netherlands (Limburg) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/26/2013 at 12:27pm / United States (Alabama) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/26/2013 at 11:16am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
by thanks_world / 12/26/2013 at 1:48am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up on Christmas morning to find that a large cock and balls had been keyed into the windscreen of my car. My new, two-week-old car, which I will be paying off for the next four years. FML
by Sophies / 12/25/2013 at 7:45pm / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Money
Today, I received a pair of earrings, a necklace, and some rings as a Christmas gift from my grandma. This would have been nice if I weren't a guy. This is her way of mocking me for wearing what she calls "girl colors", such as white. FML
by Anonymous / 12/25/2013 at 12:58pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I’m on vacation in Tunisia. Having trouble with the heat at night, I tried sleeping outside… Today, straight after we had sex, my boyfriend went to the bathroom. He stayed in there for a long… Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was…