About alexmac222 : My name is Alex and I'm from Phoenix, Arizona. I'm an avid FMyLife reader. :)
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
alexmac222's favorite FMLs
by notakeeper / 01/02/2014 at 10:50pm / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, I ate some amazing homemade brownies that my best friend's wife made for us. She waited till I'd shoved a third one into my mouth before she mentioned she made them with breast milk. Knowing her, I don't even doubt it was true. FML
by Anonymous / 01/02/2014 at 3:36pm / United Kingdom (Fife) / Miscellaneous
Today, my dad is going through a midlife crisis. He now wants to be less like a dad and more like a "best friend" to me. This mainly involves him constantly texting me, sending me stuff on Snapchat, and saying stuff like "wicked cool", "bazinga", and "swag" every chance he gets. FML
by fuck off, dad / 01/02/2014 at 12:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Vincent / 01/02/2014 at 12:04am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
by Snufflopagus / 01/01/2014 at 8:26am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by Lonesome / 01/01/2014 at 1:41am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 2:36pm / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Intimacy
Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML
by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 1:22pm / United States (Alabama) / Work
by awkword / 12/31/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 2:52am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, my 12-year-old daughter glued her left eyelid shut with fake eyelash glue. After spending 4 hours in the ER, I asked her why she did it. "I wanted to get Blake to notice me," she said. Blake is our neighbor's convict son. FML
by AnnoyedSister / 12/30/2013 at 5:28pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by laurenasabutton / 12/30/2013 at 8:07am / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Health
Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML
by Anonymous / 12/30/2013 at 7:10am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
by Anonymous / 12/29/2013 at 10:52pm / United States / Health
Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML
by Jizzyface / 12/29/2013 at 7:36am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, is my first day of recovery in a full right arm cast. Broke it on the last possible free day… Today, after months of procrastination I finally ask my mechanic to put on the new flashy hubcaps… Today, my mom accidentally hit my dog. She didn't see him and she felt so bad. She started cuddling…