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alexm501

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alexm501

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1868
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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alexm501's page activity

Visits<b>snowaholicmxz</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 7:28pm<b>yuubi</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:23pm<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 2:27pm<b>dafuck_15</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 3:13pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 9:55pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 9:56am<b>forevralone</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 1:39pm<b>DeafGirl124</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 12:35am<b>Nicky816</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 4:03am<b>liqtpie</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:20pm<b>deathposts</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 5:03am<b>mazinger_Z</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 12:42am<b>maddieannebaker</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 7:43pm<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:09am<b>CammyGal</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 1:23am<b>Darkestsoul</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 3:06am<b>cnewton84</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 11:06pm<b>dearkarina_</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 12:12am

alexm501's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

alexm501's favorite FMLs

Today, I lectured my second-grade class to be more descriptive in their writing. I gave them an assignment to describe something in the classroom. I was grading their work later, and one student wrote, "My class is taught by a fat teacher with gray hair." FML

#10541725
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25800) - you deserved it (15903)

On 05/15/2010 at 3:47am - kids - by Teaching26 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML

#10446068
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6509) - you deserved it (47396)

On 05/10/2010 at 1:28am - work - by drewig - United States (California)

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40800) - you deserved it (8437)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML

#9086835
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26627) - you deserved it (5139)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML

#9086835
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26627) - you deserved it (5139)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was in my room, in my briefs and texting my girlfriend. Suddenly, I got a massive erection and I decided to take a picture to send her. As soon as my camera phone clicked, my mom walked in. You can see my mom in the picture screaming at me. FML

#8861010
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9042) - you deserved it (26469)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:10am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I was late for work so I went to smash the side window with a big rock. The rock bounced off the window and into my face. FML

#8706906
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9054) - you deserved it (28436)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:36am - work - by chevysprint (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, at 1am, the girl of my dreams that I've been trying for over three years to date, finally asked me out via SMS. Too bad I was asleep at the time. She now thinks I've rejected her, and will no longer speak to me. FML

#8476151
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28020) - you deserved it (3371)

On 02/20/2010 at 11:22am - love - by Bilirubin (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I took my cat to the vet. He said he felt a strange lump that could be serious. I got really upset and picked her up, crying. The vet then told me I had to put her down. Absolutely devastated by having to euthanize my cat, I passed out. He meant I had to put her back on the table. FML

#7932396
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25124) - you deserved it (12893)

On 02/06/2010 at 10:19am - animals - by sadcat (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, as I was working at my babysitting job, I was watching a 3.5 year old girl. She begged and begged me to come in the jacuzzi with her, and when I put on my 2-piece bathing suit on, the young girl asked me why my stomach looked like a bagel. I looked down just to realize she was right. FML

#7925151
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20291) - you deserved it (4982)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:28am - misc - by Karie-Rose (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML

#7562154
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11070) - you deserved it (20447)

On 01/25/2010 at 1:33am - health - by nyu (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out my boyfriends' mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML

#7354557
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29508) - you deserved it (5068)

On 01/15/2010 at 6:37am - love - by Jumja (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I planted a bit of a condom wrapper in my bed so my housekeeper would think I have a love life. FML

#7161504
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13989) - you deserved it (30066)

On 01/05/2010 at 9:06am - love - by PJ (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while using the bathroom on an airplane, someone walked in on me wiping my butt. That person just so happened to be the stranger I was sitting next to. It was an 8 hour flight. FML

#7145421
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28348) - you deserved it (7454)

On 01/04/2010 at 12:40pm - misc - by GeorgiaBOYY (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to egg my ex-boyfriend's house, after finding out he cheated on me. I covered his house and car with eggs, toilet paper, and silly string. When I went to get back in my car, my keys were locked inside, the alarm went off, and my ex walked outside, with his new girlfriend. FML

#7040883
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10230) - you deserved it (49200)

On 12/30/2009 at 7:03pm - love - by BrutallyBlonde (woman) - United States (California)



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