alexis1997

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alexis1997

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 February 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6730
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About alexis1997 : I love my dog. im not going 2 lie, had sex about milions timez whith almost every girl in my town. got a big sister and brother and a littel 13 year old sister. Im an adrenaline junkie when it comes 2 sports and gamez, Also in bed. I got x box live my game tage is geco17 and im a mlg. I love Chuck Norris not in a Gay way
My brother just came back from the army. I work out in 24 hour fitnees 24/7.

alexis1997's page activity

Visits<b>holly_fly</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 12:10am<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 2:59pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 7:10pm<b>proporn</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 7:32am<b>BlackRosey_</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 10:31pm<b>WCARlover</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 12:41am<b>jubejube239</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 11:23pm<b>Cdwoods</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 3:24pm<b>Gwen4var</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 11:14pm<b>doctor__who</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 9:33am<b>TheBestAround23</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 12:32pm<b>liv1222</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 8:33pm<b>pandor</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 6:18pm<b>19Hahaha11</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 10:12pm<b>bluecabose</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 4:50pm<b>boricualuv</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 2:02am<b>Justin1459</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 8:54pm<b>bjnono001</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 4:48pm

Fucked!<b>risacat</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 7:42pm

alexis1997's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

alexis1997's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML

by CreepedOut / 03/09/2010 at 1:31am / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

by HaleyIsabelle / 03/08/2010 at 3:54pm / Love

Today, I sneezed while I was throwing up into the toilet. It turns out that throwing up is even less pleasant when the puke violently shoots out through your nose. FML

by mynoseburns / 02/22/2010 at 2:32pm / United States (Nevada) / Health

Today, while I was at my girlfriend's house, I picked up her cat and held him like he was baby Simba. Apparently he didn't enjoy that, because he managed to somehow leap out of my hands and attach himself to my chest, claws extended. I now have four one-inch-long gashes on my chest. FML

by Rafiki / 02/21/2010 at 10:14pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals

Today, my step-mom yelled at me for an hour, calling me a slut because our male dog saw me naked. FML

Today, I learned a little lesson about consequences. Yesterday, I ate a quarter as a dare. Today, I tried to poop it out. It got stuck coming out. I had to go to the doctor and explain everything. FML

by anna14 / 02/21/2010 at 2:34pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to send him a pic of myself being happy for his phone's caller ID. So I picked out a picture where I'm grinning a big grin, clearly very happy like he asked. He replies back, "You look weird there. Send a pretty one." FML

by weirdo / 02/21/2010 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in a public restroom when someone took the toilet next to mine. Moments later, a used tampon rolls into my cubicle followed by an "Oops!" A creeping hand then promptly reached under to retrieve it. Both her hand and the tampon touched my bare toes. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 9:21pm / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, I lost the beautiful necklace my boyfriend gave me for Valentine's day. I looked everywhere, and couldn't find it. My sister held the bag while I dug through the stinking trash, then after I cleaned everything up, took it out of her pocket and said she was pretending it was lost. FML

by beezybees / 02/19/2010 at 8:54pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I discovered that when business is slow at my family-owned store, my daughter and another employee make a habit of sneaking away to the back room. I have literally been paying this kid to screw around with my daughter. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 3:36pm / United States (Iowa) / Kids

Today, I got a reply to my Valentine's Day card that I sent to my girlfriend. I'll get the address right next time because her neighbor is really creeping me out now. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 3:25am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I returned home to find that my boyfriend's dog had gotten into the garbage and ripped all my used pads to shreds. There's a trail of Always tatters leading to his dog bed, and blood everywhere. My blood. Oh God. FML

by OMGraven / 02/19/2010 at 3:24am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML

by GeneralElement / 02/19/2010 at 1:32am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was complaining to my roommate that I never get asked out. Then, at work, a mentally challenged man left me his phone number on his pay ticket. Well, I guess I can't complain about never getting asked out. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 12:31am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my little sister walked in on me and my boyfriend. I told her I would give her 10$ if she just pretended it never happened. She agreed, walked out and shut the door. Later, when my parents arrived, she yells: "Nicole and Joe were naked upstairs!" FML

by ohemgee23 / 02/19/2010 at 12:31am / United States (California) / Kids