About alexis1997 : I love my dog. im not going 2 lie, had sex about milions timez whith almost every girl in my town. got a big sister and brother and a littel 13 year old sister. Im an adrenaline junkie when it comes 2 sports and gamez, Also in bed. I got x box live my game tage is geco17 and im a mlg. I love Chuck Norris not in a Gay way
My brother just came back from the army. I work out in 24 hour fitnees 24/7.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I told my boyfriend that I loved his flaming red hair. He told me that he loved the fuzz on my butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20107) - you deserved it (5204)
On 01/09/2010 at 3:16am - misc - by Snowin2007 (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my sister and I bought new cell phones. We both wanted the same phone in red, but the guy told us that there was only one red phone left. Flirting with him, I said "You should give the prettier sister the red phone." My new phone is black. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7271) - you deserved it (27130)
On 01/09/2010 at 12:58am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I asked my mom if she thought I looked skinny in my shorts. She jiggled my leg fat, looked up at me and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8855) - you deserved it (15434)
On 01/09/2010 at 12:36am - health - by Ashy104 (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was wearing a shirt that had a picture of a squirrel and acorns with a caption reading "Protect Your Nuts". My dad walked up to me, read my shirt, then punched me in the balls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7599) - you deserved it (27898)
On 01/09/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by squirrel (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, as I went to the bathroom in a port-a-potty at a park, I forgot to lock the door. A little girl opens the door and then slams it right away. As she walked away I heard her say "no, there's a man in there". I'm a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16783) - you deserved it (3636)
On 01/08/2010 at 9:09pm - misc - by crappy_day (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I had the sudden urge to sneeze as I was wiping my ass. Out of instinct, I used my hand to cover my mouth. I never let go of the toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20976) - you deserved it (24245)
On 01/08/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by Hugh_Jankles (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my husband is completely convinced that his taking a massive dump after being constipated is exactly like the time I gave birth to our twins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24988) - you deserved it (3129)
On 01/08/2010 at 11:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was on a long-haul plane journey home from my holiday. After 5 hours, I decided to stretch my arms whilst watching a movie. Little did I know that a little girl was approaching, running down the aisle as my arm stretched out. I accidentally clothes-lined a little 9 year old girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20541) - you deserved it (2615)
On 01/07/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by James4929 (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I found out that while I was on vacation my neighbor had let my brother into my apartment. I don't have a brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25206) - you deserved it (1147)
Today, I did my workout at the gym instead of at home as I usually do, since I'm paranoid about people seeing up my shorts. I told myself to get over it, because it's impossible. After my extensive workout, I realized that there was a hole in the crotch of my shorts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16635) - you deserved it (7112)
On 01/07/2010 at 1:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was going over some paperwork with my back to my office door. As I turn around, my boss enters and says my name loudly. I was startled so bad that I jumped, yelped, and a high-pitched fart snuck out. Everyone in the office now gives prior notice before dropping by the "fart guy's" office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16896) - you deserved it (2950)
On 01/07/2010 at 12:44pm - work - by Mic (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was going to the bathroom. As I was about to wipe, I noticed that the toilet paper had butterflies printed on it. Never before had I felt bad for wiping my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5928) - you deserved it (18226)
On 01/07/2010 at 9:43am - misc - by Doomy (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out my dad spent most of the $500 I earned from mowing lawns on an Xbox 360 for himself. He was the one who encouraged me to put the money in the bank for college and to learn responsibility. I'm 14 years old. He's 37. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26340) - you deserved it (1750)
On 01/06/2010 at 1:19pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I went to the DMV to renew my license. When I gave the woman behind the desk my name and social security number she looked confused. She then called over her manager, who did the same thing. Getting nervous, I asked what was wrong. Apparently according to the state of Illinois I'm dead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38276) - you deserved it (1572)
On 01/06/2010 at 9:55am - misc - by driver (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, one of my managers at work asked me to carrying our new Frappe machine to front counter for assembling. Being 5 months pregnant, I explained to her I am unable to safely lift more than 20-30lbs. I was then fired and told that I shouldn't use being pregnant as an excuse to not work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36918) - you deserved it (3201)
On 01/06/2010 at 6:06am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Friday 24 May 2013
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