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alexis083000

Offline (the 09/15/2014 at 2:29am) | Search for a member

alexis083000

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 30 August 2000 (14 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1061
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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alexis083000's page activity

Visits<b>jvsoccer23</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:27am<b>thatjonesboy223</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 2:50am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 11:19pm

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I agree, their lives suck

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50 favourites

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alexis083000's favorite FMLs

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28261) - you deserved it (16296)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I took my girlfriend of a year out on a date, a nice fancy dinner and a movie. After dinner, I said that I was feeling sick and just wanted to go home. I didn't have the heart to tell her that dinner was so expensive that I didn't have money for the movie. FML

#21258006
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37814) - you deserved it (7325)

On 09/14/2014 at 11:32am - love - by jgboy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found my son trying to comb his hair with scissors. He's the same kid who thought that if he ate toothpaste, he would never have to brush his teeth again. FML

Today, my girlfriend told me that the necklace I gave her wasn't a "unique enough gift." I spent two weeks making that necklace, link by link. FML

#21257946
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38092) - you deserved it (2511)

On 09/14/2014 at 8:53am - love - by NoConfusion (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

#21257417
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37512) - you deserved it (4176)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend texted me saying, "I have some Durex and want your help" so I rushed to her house. She had meant to say "Duluxe". I had to help her paint her bedroom. FML

#21257403
84 comments

Today, I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

#21257305
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33715) - you deserved it (2884)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:56am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. We were getting into the mood so I tried to eat the popcorn kind of sexually, causing me to choke on the popcorn and throw up. FML

#21257293
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30048) - you deserved it (14741)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:29am - misc - by Nat - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my daughter out driving to practice for her road test. I told her to make a left into a parking lot. She missed the 30 foot wide entrance, but not the two foot wide tree. FML

#21255774
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34960) - you deserved it (3444)

On 09/10/2014 at 4:15pm - misc - by Crash (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I started a new job. Three of my Kenyan coworkers keep getting together and reminding me that having more than one wife is okay in their country. I've gotten 3 marriage proposals from married men so far. FML

#21255696
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33055) - you deserved it (2811)

On 09/10/2014 at 1:16pm - work - by notmarryingyou - United States (Washington)

Today, a guy tried to pick me up with the line, "You're ugly. Just kidding. You're my date." FML

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39544) - you deserved it (11013)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I fell asleep with my luggage at a bus terminal. Upon waking up, I found that someone had opened my bags and stolen all my socks. FML

#21255144
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34771) - you deserved it (6682)

On 09/09/2014 at 4:23pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

Today, I invited my deadbeat dad over for dinner, hoping we could resolve our issues and build a proper relationship. Just minutes after he arrived, I caught him stealing money from my purse. He actually said I owe him for raising me. He ditched my mom and me when I was 5. FML

#21255044
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41196) - you deserved it (3345)

On 09/09/2014 at 12:47pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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