Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

alexandraa

Search for a member

alexandraa

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 February 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11424
  • Number of comments : 585
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About alexandraa : I bleed Crimson! *RTR!!* I'm an adrenaline junkie at heart and dont like being given boundries. I like people who can be sarcastic and laugh about tense situations. I can't text and carry on a conversation at the same time, most of the time I drive with my knee and I have a hard time assuming someone isnt being honest with me. I've had the opportunity to travel a lot with my family and they're pretty much all I could ever ask for in this world. I believe I truly am lucky. Life is good.


"People believe that if you love someone hard enough things will work out.. well, people are wrong.." -One Tree Hill

"The person left smiling when things go wrong has just thought of someone to blame it on."

"..and I'm not the same I used to be. I'm tough as hell and hard to please." -Brantley Gilbert

alexandraa's page activity

Visits<b>arich6210</b> - one hour ago<b>Jthewat</b> - 24 hours ago<b>rarsome</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:02am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:06pm<b>conman1198</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 9:20pm<b>tonyromoy</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:28am<b>tyl3r2000</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:24pm<b>mikey1</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 10:48pm<b>dextrementor</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:38am<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 6:41pm<b>bailemat</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 9:47am<b>duchi425</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 10:45pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 10:37am<b>Gemma_Mansonite</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 11:53am<b>zRapture</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 1:51am<b>stupidretriever</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 12:28am<b>Aurelian</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:36pm<b>DaniloDanigga</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 12:53am

alexandraa's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

alexandraa's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, and then he said, "Lets pretend you are someone else." FML

#4590136
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52788) - you deserved it (4913)

On 08/17/2009 at 1:13am - intimacy - by somebodyelse (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while teaching swim lessons, a boy was holding a noodle and claimed it was his fishing rod. Trying to be fun, I grabbed on and told him to "reel" me in. He then yells out 'YAY, I caught a whale!'. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice "oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML

#2308066
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71125) - you deserved it (18440)

On 05/26/2009 at 12:53pm - intimacy - by alexis89 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was having cybersex via webcam with my boyfriend. Trying to be as sexy as I could, I started sucking on my finger. Judging by the look on my boyfriend's face, he was getting really into it. As I started getting into it too, I shoved my finger too far down and puked all over my laptop. FML

#1387325
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23530) - you deserved it (119687)

On 04/27/2009 at 9:51am - intimacy - by BARF (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friends and I were celebrating Spring Break by going out to a club. I saw a very, very cute girl sipping a drink at the bar all by herself. Trying to be a stud I walked over and said "What are you doing Friday night?" Her response: "Not you." FML

#1244870
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23292) - you deserved it (73341)

On 04/23/2009 at 12:20am - intimacy - by rejected (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

#1104891
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (474453) - you deserved it (29155)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

#364382
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (181073) - you deserved it (28517)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:20pm - intimacy - by illequipt - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year old daughter from her room texts me, "Stop." FML

#197620
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29832) - you deserved it (76971)

On 03/03/2009 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by dad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

#185544
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72672) - you deserved it (15764)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm - love - by ohmygoodness (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

#86179
739 comments

I agree, your life sucks (769185) - you deserved it (82727)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
504 comments

I agree, your life sucks (231328) - you deserved it (81130)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: