alexandraa

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alexandraa

43Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 February 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13245
  • Number of comments : 585
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About alexandraa : I bleed Crimson! *RTR!!* I'm an adrenaline junkie at heart and dont like being given boundries. I like people who can be sarcastic and laugh about tense situations. I can't text and carry on a conversation at the same time, most of the time I drive with my knee and I have a hard time assuming someone isnt being honest with me. I've had the opportunity to travel a lot with my family and they're pretty much all I could ever ask for in this world. I believe I truly am lucky. Life is good.


"People believe that if you love someone hard enough things will work out.. well, people are wrong.." -One Tree Hill

"The person left smiling when things go wrong has just thought of someone to blame it on."

"..and I'm not the same I used to be. I'm tough as hell and hard to please." -Brantley Gilbert

alexandraa's page activity

Visits<b>ultimate41</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 11:24pm<b>One_In_Three</b> - the 11/24/2016 at 5:30pm<b>1991stealth</b> - the 11/18/2016 at 3:07pm<b>stfuwtf</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 10:42am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 11/11/2016 at 8:16am<b>footinthemouth07</b> - the 10/30/2016 at 11:16pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 10/22/2016 at 10:32pm<b>weedle99</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 8:52pm<b>Yelson</b> - the 10/15/2016 at 1:51pm<b>M3DO</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 3:39pm<b>cuz803</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 4:49pm<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 4:38pm<b>atradr</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 7:36pm<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 4:37am<b>Wolfo06</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 12:51am<b>guskta</b> - the 09/16/2016 at 3:37am<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 8:06pm<b>Emma1562</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 11:46pm

Fucked!<b>Jiratias</b> - the 11/11/2016 at 3:38pm<b>cuz803</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 10:49pm<b>Emma1562</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 5:46am<b>mehibud</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 9:49pm<b>salii321</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 4:38pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 5:42pm<b>AZ_Hockey_Dude</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 3:22am<b>sandormatyi</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 7:30pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 5:32am<b>Brighton_Cruz</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 4:27am<b>allred1997</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 9:03am<b>omgitsmoe</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 12:04pm<b>Malahkaa</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 9:46pm<b>analise1998</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 1:28am<b>jordanrecatto</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 7:04pm<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 5:21am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 2:21am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 6:18am

alexandraa's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

alexandraa's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2009 at 6:44am / United States (Alabama) / Health

Today, a cat came up to me on the pavement so I petted it a little. An elderly man rode past on his bicycle and shouted "I'd like to stroke your pussy too!" FML

by pussystroker / 11/19/2009 at 12:20pm / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Intimacy

Today, there was something itching me in my bed, it was the tag to my pillow case. I ripped it off, very hard and slipped and punched myself right in the face. I broke my nose. FML

by jellybean / 11/06/2009 at 6:37pm / United States / Health

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find a very gorgeous girl in my bed. Her only words to me were "did anything happen?" When I replied yes she began to cry. Nice to know I was someone's rock bottom. FML

by feelthelove / 11/02/2009 at 1:08pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

by sad_dad / 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, whilst holding a hand rail on a packed bus, I was rubbing my hand along, and playing with, what I thought was a join in the metal. It was an old woman's finger. FML

by FingerBang / 10/21/2009 at 2:32am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML

by SheWentCrayola / 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML

by SheWentCrayola / 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML

by sarahh38 / 09/16/2009 at 2:23pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2009 at 1:19am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriends lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

by awkwardbf / 09/08/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend at her house. When things started heating up, I heard the front door open and my girlfriend said that it must be her Dad. She handed me my clothes, pushed me out the window, and told me to knock at the front door. Her Dad answered, holding my shoes. FML

by Mattyboy / 08/24/2009 at 5:57am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML

by ShiriSarah / 08/20/2009 at 10:39am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, and then he said, "Lets pretend you are someone else." FML

by somebodyelse / 08/17/2009 at 1:13am / United States (California) / Intimacy