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alexa315

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alexa315
  • Town/Country : USA!!!
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 669
  • Number of comments : 99
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About alexa315 : I like the following:
Pink Floyd
Alice in Chains
My cat ozzy
My iPhone, iPad, iPod
Horror movies
Outdoor stuff
Kickboxing
Black ops (nazi zombies is amazing)
Mw3
Not necessarily in that order^
Etc...

If ya want add me on ps3 (bluefish315)
Add me on kik bluefish315

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alexa315's favorite FMLs

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8840) - you deserved it (31171)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I discovered my children had found my vibrator and buried it in the cat's litter box. FML

#19850668
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16785) - you deserved it (8204)

On 06/26/2012 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Heather (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while at the beach, as a joke, I told my girlfriend that I was a shark. She then poked my eyes and punched me in the nose. When I started to get mad, she just shrugged and asked, "What? You're the one that wanted to be a shark. Don't you watch Shark Week?" FML

#19767813
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7367) - you deserved it (18061)

On 06/10/2012 at 10:33pm - misc - by sharkboy (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my mother is trying to convince me to divorce my husband. He has a tattoo of a skull on his shoulder and she believes this means he kills people. FML

#19742769
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18517) - you deserved it (2138)

On 06/06/2012 at 4:06am - love - by facepalm (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I brought my 90-year-old grandfather into school for a project that required to bring in "a first-hand account" of the Great Depression. He started off by telling the class how in his day, they "threw rocks at black people." FML

#19608717
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20241) - you deserved it (2663)

On 05/11/2012 at 7:52pm - misc - by Class (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML

#19592995
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19083) - you deserved it (3345)

On 05/08/2012 at 4:48pm - kids - by A-64 (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

#19592298
367 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24709) - you deserved it (2554)

On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

#19554232
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6398) - you deserved it (38546)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to the park with a girl I like. She got playful and climbed a tree, insisting I come up, too. While we were sitting and enjoying the view, she suddenly knocked me off the branch, sending me crashing to the ground. FML

#17044737
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28401) - you deserved it (4481)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:13pm - love - by wolf boy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8404) - you deserved it (38242)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I sent my romantic interest a sexy text about a dream I had about a "sex gameshow." I sent it by replying to the last text sent. I'm now responsible for traumatizing my 12 year old niece who could only reply, "Like Jeopardy?" FML

#16842955
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7852) - you deserved it (30591)

On 06/25/2011 at 12:32am - intimacy - by PandaMantis (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was called to reports of a drunk and disorderly male. I arrived to discover a drunk man having explosive diarrhoea in a photo booth. He turned to me me and shouted 'God save the Queen'. It's then that I remembered that it's my job to do something about it. FML

#13444115
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23359) - you deserved it (2213)

On 10/14/2010 at 9:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Reserved

Today, it was really windy and rainy causing me to trip and knock into a little kid. While still gathering myself, I apologized and patted the kid on its' head. Then I see people around me starting to laugh. I turn and look at the kid, and discover I've been interacting with a trash can. FML

#832092
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22156) - you deserved it (37674)

On 04/06/2009 at 7:47am - kids - by trashcanned (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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