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alex_gen

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alex_gen
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  • Number of visits : 175
  • Number of comments : 99
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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alex_gen's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, I had to calm my hallucinating mom after she accidentally overdosed on one of her pills, then spend ages trying to protect her from the "monkey" on the wall. FML

#20866110
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35704) - you deserved it (2212)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:04pm - misc - by D - United States (California)

Today, I resigned from my job in favor of a higher-paying one. After I filled out and filed the necessary papers, my boss told me that I had been nominated to replace him when he retired in a month. His job pays at least twice what I'm now making. Thanks for telling me, asshat. FML

#20863852
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37486) - you deserved it (12701)

On 09/01/2013 at 11:18pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while I was teaching my chickens to eat out of my hand, one of the hens bit my finger and I dropped the entire handful of treats. Result: bonanza for the bird. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML

Today, while on my run, I was attacked by my neighbor's new dog. It apparently didn't like me running past their house and broke free from its chain. I now have stitches and was just told that I'm probably being taken to court for the emotional distress I caused her and the dog. FML

#13397431
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30387) - you deserved it (2186)

On 10/10/2010 at 8:57pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)



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