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by ashbeat / 01/01/2013 at 10:20am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by why? / 01/01/2013 at 12:41am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend took me to his house and introduced me to his parents. He also showed me around his bedroom. I think he forgot to remove the dartboard on his wall, taped to which was a swiss-cheesed printout of one of my Facebook photos. FML
by WasZumTeufel? / 12/31/2012 at 7:55pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/31/2012 at 6:16am / United States (Washington) / Health
by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 9:45pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy
by kmtranter / 12/28/2012 at 6:40am / United Kingdom (Brent) / Intimacy
Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML
by Alone / 12/28/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 12/27/2012 at 11:31pm / United States / Love
by gaggin / 12/26/2012 at 2:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by CambodianAsshole / 12/25/2012 at 1:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom and I went to Best Buy for some Christmas shopping. She picked up some presents for me and told me not to look at what she was buying. When we got to the register, she didn't have enough money, and I ended up having to buy my own presents. FML
by dude, where's my balls? :( / 12/22/2012 at 3:25pm / United States (Alaska) / Money
by brunetteshavemorefun / 12/22/2012 at 12:56pm / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Intimacy
Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML
by divingconfidence / 12/22/2012 at 6:21am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/22/2012 at 6:15am / Australia / Intimacy
Today, my co-worker had a bad cold that stuffed up his ears and nose. This wouldn't have been a problem, except that he believed his farts were silent and scentless. They were so vile, they could have killed a horse. FML
by Iknoweverything / 12/22/2012 at 3:06am / United States (Minnesota) / Work
- Today, my wife was talking to our 9 month-old baby. “Your father really is an example.” I smiled,… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.… Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the…