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aichd13

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aichd13

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  • Number of visits : 499
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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aichd13's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31480) - you deserved it (5448)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend wrote me a break-up letter, using Comic Sans. FML

#17576599
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31211) - you deserved it (4017)

On 08/25/2011 at 10:33am - love - by hendrix1 - United States (California)

Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant, where the chefs cook the food right in front of you. Our chef tossed an egg in the air, but sadly didn't catch it. Don't worry though, my hair got it instead. FML

#17136219
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28855) - you deserved it (3109)

On 07/16/2011 at 1:24pm - misc - by KatrinaKitten - United States (New York)

Today, while babysitting a five year old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML

#17067732
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13309) - you deserved it (52257)

On 07/11/2011 at 3:21pm - kids - by dummy (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML

#16667115
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36734) - you deserved it (14252)

On 06/14/2011 at 9:17pm - intimacy - by Username - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

#16657656
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13709) - you deserved it (48019)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55594) - you deserved it (4266)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

#16205540
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61995) - you deserved it (9682)

On 05/16/2011 at 12:33pm - health - by Bobby M - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

#16205540
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61995) - you deserved it (9682)

On 05/16/2011 at 12:33pm - health - by Bobby M - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

#16101317
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42484) - you deserved it (17740)

On 05/09/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by coldwetnose (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

#15042917
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50386) - you deserved it (41756)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got stuck in a small elevator. It started to violently judder up and down after I pressed the 'Help' buzzer. The man on the intercom wouldn't stop laughing at how my voice was jumpy from the juddering movements before he called for help. FML

#15019943
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23782) - you deserved it (2498)

On 02/17/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by stuckinalift (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46847) - you deserved it (9273)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was leaving school to get tested for peptic ulcers, because my stomach has been hurting for a few months. To wish me luck, one of my friends gave me a friendly punch in the stomach. I threw up blood. FML

#14893456
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43445) - you deserved it (2716)

On 02/08/2011 at 7:48am - health - by soccerscout7 -

Today, I reactivated my Facebook account, having not used it for three months. My "friends" didn't realize this. According to their recent status updates, I'm disgustingly fat, have a hook nose, and I'm secretly hated. FML

#14216323
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30985) - you deserved it (4419)

On 12/15/2010 at 8:01pm - misc - by unlovedfatty (man) - United States (New York)



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