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aertzc
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  • Number of visits : 546
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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aertzc's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend decided we are ready for the next step in our relationship. Apparently that next step is her taking a dump with the door open. FML

#6540223
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31950) - you deserved it (4201)

On 11/30/2009 at 8:55pm - love - by Cpm (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a little girl came up to me and said "Hi, my name is Lindsey, lets be friends!". I thought she was cute so I played along and said "Okay! My name is Jen!" Her Reply: "Wait, nevermind, I don't want to be friends anymore. You smell funny." FML

#2002110
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44041) - you deserved it (11262)

On 05/17/2009 at 12:33am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at work, some little girl went in the bathroom for quite a while. Came out for two minutes and went back in. She then came out with her finger clutched in a paper towel. One of the other coworkers went in to check the bathroom. The little girl wrote "Hi!" with her own poop. FML

#1957441
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37149) - you deserved it (2047)

On 05/15/2009 at 3:20am - work - by RunningMurphy (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML

#1927832
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57338) - you deserved it (5313)

On 05/14/2009 at 11:24am - kids - by TwinDad (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boss in my police dept. told me to start enforcing the "no bikes on sidewalks" law which we usually ignore. I pulled up behind the first person I saw riding a bike on a sidewalk and flashed my lights. It turned out to be a boy with down syndrome who was so upset he cried and peed. FML

#1873623
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65552) - you deserved it (11925)

On 05/12/2009 at 2:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend stopped making out with me to watch a thirty minute infomercial on the Topsy-Turvy upside down tomato planter. FML

#1221446
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51234) - you deserved it (6119)

On 04/22/2009 at 1:02pm - love - by T-Pain (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213772) - you deserved it (73293)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)



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