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  • Number of visits : 133
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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I agree, their lives suck

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ad_o9's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my mother if I could have my boyfriend sleep over for Valentine's day weekend. Her response? "If you're on your period he can. Unless he's into that. Then no." FML

#20496085
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20619) - you deserved it (38072)

On 02/06/2013 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by dab1230 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29132) - you deserved it (4671)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML

#19563136
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31408) - you deserved it (6135)

On 05/02/2012 at 11:46am - intimacy - by winnerwinner (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27973) - you deserved it (5913)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

#19101207
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35204) - you deserved it (5462)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States

Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML

#19062994
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23529) - you deserved it (4472)

On 02/13/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by cieee - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
216 comments

Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML

#18814672
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34721) - you deserved it (12223)

On 01/15/2012 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by lolwut - United States

Today, I told my parents that I wanted to donate blood. My dad helpfully interjected, "Sorry, they don't accept blood from gingers." FML

#18678605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29415) - you deserved it (7703)

On 01/01/2012 at 8:22pm - health - by GingerJ (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML

#18643236
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28351) - you deserved it (5008)

On 12/29/2011 at 10:48am - health - by OH COME ON (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34446) - you deserved it (24582)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML

Today, my nephew spent a long while enthusiastically telling me how amazing his new 3D TV system is. I felt his pain as his face turned white when he remembered that I'm blind in one eye since birth. FML

#17844542
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26617) - you deserved it (2167)

On 09/27/2011 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37256) - you deserved it (3285)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

#17128085
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34876) - you deserved it (8411)

On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)



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