Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

achillesJC123

Offline (14 hours ago) | Search for a member

achillesJC123

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4429
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

achillesJC123's page activity

Visits<b>Miss_Klutzie</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 3:23am<b>lulubelles</b> - the 07/04/2013 at 4:21pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 1:20pm<b>mr_sarcastic416</b> - the 05/08/2013 at 11:36pm<b>foxykz</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 5:32pm

achillesJC123's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of achillesJC123's badges

achillesJC123's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents held a big family dinner at our house. Being the only underage person there, I had to sit there while everyone got progressively drunker and started commenting on how eerily similar I look to Shamu the whale. FML

#20821917
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43000) - you deserved it (4239)

On 08/05/2013 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I actually had to explain to my sister that Shrek was not in fact based on a true story. She replied that I'm a "clueless twat". FML

#20821476
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38997) - you deserved it (3952)

On 08/05/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by riiiighhhttttt (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was trying to explain to my mom that I've been having panic attacks. I ended up having a panic attack from talking about having a panic attack. FML

#20821432
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41722) - you deserved it (4355)

On 08/05/2013 at 1:11am - health - by seriously? - United States (Ohio)

Today, it was my first day at my new job. I had to break up two fistfights, then leave work early with a black eye. This is not what I had in mind when I applied to work at a retirement home. FML

#20820605
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48024) - you deserved it (3484)

On 08/04/2013 at 4:51pm - work - by x_o (man) - Hungary (Gyor-Moson-Sopron)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68262) - you deserved it (9006)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML

#20820474
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46056) - you deserved it (2755)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:09pm - work - by Neanderthals walk among us (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, I've been getting calls for over a week on my home phone, cell phone, and the work phone at my night shift, in which someone whispers terrifying Satanic-sounding chants at me. I've now found out that the caller is my best "friend". His explanation: "You seemed lonely, man." FML

#20820394
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42721) - you deserved it (4231)

On 08/04/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by newbffswelcome (man) - Vietnam (Ha Noi)

Today, my husband and I arrived in Barbados on vacation. We visited a club, and they had a selection of drinks with weird names. My husband ordered one called the Raging Bitch, flicked his finger towards me, and said to the barkeeper, "Might as well get something I'm used to." FML

#20820272
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43984) - you deserved it (10105)

On 08/04/2013 at 12:45pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, I got several noise complaints from various neighbours about my "dog that won't stop barking". I don't own a dog, my neighbour owns the noisy dog. She sent me a complaint as well. FML

#20820030
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55351) - you deserved it (7295)

On 08/04/2013 at 7:21am - animals - by Barking Mad - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my fiancé told me he wished he never met me and that he wished I didn't exist. Our wedding is next week. FML

#20819957
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49443) - you deserved it (4858)

On 08/04/2013 at 4:37am - love - by uniannonymous - United Kingdom (Merton)

Today, I was stretching after a group run. I noticed one of the girls was having problems balancing, so I told her that I have horrible balance too, but that it'll get better. She sneered and said she had a brain tumor when she was a kid, and that's why she has such bad balance. FML

#20819891
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44577) - you deserved it (6287)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:11am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the kids I was babysitting somehow found a pair of my underwear. They asked if they could use them to go parachuting. FML

#20819762
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38271) - you deserved it (6339)

On 08/04/2013 at 1:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML

#20819538
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48622) - you deserved it (4862)

On 08/03/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was at the store with my kids. My 5-year-old son wanted to carry the milk carton, so I let him. He dropped it and it spilled. I was really embarrassed. Then he decided to get on the floor and lick the milk off the ground. Everyone stared at me accusingly. FML

#20819263
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43094) - you deserved it (6535)

On 08/03/2013 at 8:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my hamster had babies. I came home just in time to witness her kick the mutilated bodies of her two babies out of her house, then crawl back in and go to sleep. Now my sister refuses to touch her and calls her a "baby-eating demon." FML

#20818742
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40594) - you deserved it (3773)

On 08/03/2013 at 1:59pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: