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acfreak69

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acfreak69

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  • Number of visits : 191
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acfreak69's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45057) - you deserved it (4769)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

#20927261
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59332) - you deserved it (4522)

On 10/20/2013 at 9:02am - intimacy - by Female_Lucifer (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my parents surprised me by redecorating my room. I think they were more surprised by the box of naughty toys under my bed. FML

#20902324
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40055) - you deserved it (9900)

On 09/30/2013 at 6:41pm - intimacy - by A.Summers (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

#20798640
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56054) - you deserved it (11957)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:04am - intimacy - by suckstosuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend posted a screenshot from a porno on my Facebook, because the girl in it looked freakishly similar to me. My dad commented, asking for a link to the video. FML

#20797729
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52280) - you deserved it (4050)

On 07/22/2013 at 3:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, I had to wake my mom up. While she was naked. On the toilet. FML

Today, my dentist dropped dead of a heart attack. This depressing event was made worse by the fact that he collapsed while his hands were in my mouth. FML

Today, an old lady steamrolled over my foot with her wheelchair, then laughed as she slowly rolled away, leaving my toes in ruins. FML

#20788409
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41084) - you deserved it (3436)

On 07/17/2013 at 1:38pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at his parents' house. I was overjoyed. His mom hugged me with tears in her eyes. His father, who never really spoke before, hugged me a few hours later when we were alone, his hands traveling to my ass and whispering, "I can change your mind." FML

#20788139
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66644) - you deserved it (3867)

On 07/17/2013 at 10:20am - misc - by ilivehere (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46763) - you deserved it (13178)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my 15-year-old daughter's pregnancy test came back positive. I wanted to know who the father is, so I could sit the two of them down to talk the situation through with them. She isn't sure if it's her best friend, or our neighbor's son. FML

#20777059
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62445) - you deserved it (10817)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:19am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the weird guy that lives next door is my biological father. FML

#20776380
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57976) - you deserved it (3588)

On 07/11/2013 at 6:26pm - misc - by yayme. - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML

#20770545
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29933) - you deserved it (65892)

On 07/08/2013 at 1:27pm - love - by Erica (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend's proposal speech somehow ended with him breaking up with me. FML

#20752113
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56646) - you deserved it (3830)

On 06/28/2013 at 8:23am - love - by confusedandnowsingle (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my cousin thought it would be cool to put a firecracker in an abandoned birdhouse. Before I could tell him not to, it exploded and about 30 wasps came after me like the wrath of God. FML

#20749556
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48690) - you deserved it (4602)

On 06/27/2013 at 12:27am - animals - by EpicJman2828 (man) - United States



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