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Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64897) - you deserved it (4249)
On 10/08/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56413) - you deserved it (3657)
On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)
Today, I found out I'm on wage garnishment because my mother, who took out a student loan for me back in '05, didn't pay off the $2015 owed when she said she would. I got screwed over financially because of her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24073) - you deserved it (7091)
On 09/17/2009 at 5:32am - money - by MochiMomoChan (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was walking on a busy street. I saw this beautiful blonde walking across the street and a car was coming. I wanted to be like in the movies where the guy pushes the girl out of the way so she doesn't get hit. I accidentally pushed her the wrong way. Right into the car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9174) - you deserved it (54540)
On 09/07/2009 at 3:21pm - misc - by ilovefootball (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (97346) - you deserved it (23462)
On 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by mandy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing 'It Wasn't Me' by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47085) - you deserved it (3324)
On 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm - love - by shaggy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29938) - you deserved it (3052)
On 08/21/2009 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by Ben (man) - United States
Today, I decided I need help, so I confessed to my mother that I'm bulimic. After she looked it up online she started screaming at me for "Wasting food that I'm not paying for." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41693) - you deserved it (9245)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:43pm - health - by Rainbow92 (woman) - Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya)
Today, I farted while I was in line at the bank. I tried to pretend it wasn't me by looking at the man behind me and turning back with a disgusted look on my face. I thought I had gotten away with it when the man yells "It wasn't me, this bitch did it". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6115) - you deserved it (72778)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by moutz (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend of 5 years. I love her so much and I've been treating her extremely well. Before I could pop the question, she said in these exact words: "Babe, our relationship is like a drunken night. Fun while it lasted but its something I'd rather forget." FML
I agree, your life sucks (49039) - you deserved it (2247)
On 08/17/2009 at 8:04am - love - by singleandheartbroken (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32256) - you deserved it (12819)
On 08/11/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Lilly_28 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I got into a heated argument at a restaurant with a guy I am seeing because he refused to let me pay for the bill and I thought it was sexist. When he finally agreed, I gave the waiter my card, only to have him return a minute later telling me it was declined. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8387) - you deserved it (53162)
On 06/17/2009 at 11:25am - money - by feminist (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (73213) - you deserved it (15327)
On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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