abasio

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abasio

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2333
  • Number of comments : 194
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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abasio's page activity

Visits<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 3:21am<b>vsus98</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 9:04am<b>rebamoo</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 4:40am<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 4:59am<b>Arkajion</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 1:44am<b>Janawa</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:22pm<b>taytaysings97</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 5:56pm<b>Aiden89</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 10:43am<b>monisv</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 8:35am<b>Inkay</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 11:09am<b>Dewoe</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 8:54am<b>fagnig</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 6:51am<b>Disobey</b> - the 02/28/2013 at 5:13pm<b>NinaTatianna</b> - the 10/17/2011 at 12:35am<b>ImanAzol</b> - the 04/05/2011 at 12:40pm<b>sonofkarma</b> - the 04/03/2011 at 10:22pm<b>rallets</b> - the 04/03/2011 at 1:38pm<b>muchagente</b> - the 04/03/2011 at 1:28pm

abasio's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

abasio's favorite FMLs

Today, the man who tried to mug me sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML

by Anonymous / 08/22/2012 at 2:01am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I had an interview for my dream job. I was offered coffee and a donut. It was going well until I took a bite of the donut and started choking on it. I coughed so hard I ended up vomiting into his garbage can. FML

by lonelyharts86 / 06/13/2012 at 10:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, while looking through my wedding photos, I realised my wife had done a duck face in every single one. FML

by caaarl / 04/19/2012 at 3:46pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a serious conversation about our future. Somehow it turned into a 10-minute discussion about what time of day we usually take a crap. FML

by kellie1115 / 04/10/2012 at 12:41am / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML

by displeased / 04/05/2012 at 2:47am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I took a very expensive flight to New York City for a job interview. I waited in my hotel room all day for the phone call to go to my once in a lifetime interview. By noon I was nervous, eight I was pissed. Around ten I realized my phone was still in airplane mode. FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2012 at 8:35am / United States (California) / Work

Today, while I was on the bus to work, a morbidly obese man sat down next to me. When my stop came and I stood up to get off, he just looked at me, said with a smirk, "good luck with that," and went back to reading his paper. I missed my stop. FML

by busfail / 03/22/2012 at 2:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation

Today, I went to Hooters for lunch. My food was brought to me by a man. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2012 at 1:00pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I became a father. Unfortunately, my wife found out. FML

by Major3 / 03/10/2012 at 9:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2012 at 12:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

by lotrgeek / 02/13/2012 at 8:37am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML

by vanessa560 / 01/03/2012 at 2:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2012 at 12:30pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was having 'goodbye' sex with my boyfriend. Now for the next four months he's going to remember our last time as the one where I farted and couldn't stop laughing. FML

by atleese / 12/31/2011 at 10:37am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy