About _xoxoscore_ : 15.
I love animaaaaals. ;D
I have a lot of fuck-ups in my life.
About _xoxoscore_ : 15.
_xoxoscore_'s FML badges
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
_xoxoscore_'s favorite FMLs
Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML
by Anna L. / 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by noooooooo / 03/17/2013 at 8:10pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML
by badmom / 02/25/2012 at 6:25am / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous
by Yo mom / 12/27/2011 at 2:12am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by shitpile / 08/06/2010 at 2:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML
by rachaaaaeul / 08/06/2010 at 3:07am / United States (Utah) / Love
Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML
by Toothy_Peg / 06/13/2009 at 11:13am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by lauren / 03/30/2009 at 1:39am / United States (Wisconsin) / Love
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love
Today, I drunkenly buried my girlfriend's recently deceased cat. Later she asked to see it and came back inside crying. It turns out I didn't bury it completely and its two back legs were poking out of the dirt. FML
by jf29 / 01/30/2009 at 7:49pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
- « Previous page
- Next page »
- Today, my boyfriend of 2 years met my family for the first time due to long distance. At dinner I… Today I was bidding on a nice skirt on ebay for my wife and I did typo of 85089$ instead of 85.89$.… Today, I tried to wake up my boyfriend for morning sex with a Blowjob, he woke up looked at me said…