_overandout_

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Offline (the 02/05/2015 at 12:53pm)

_overandout_

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2443
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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_overandout_'s page activity

Visits<b>man_o_reason</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 11:24am<b>Doge_Challenger</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 7:36pm

_overandout_'s FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of _overandout_'s badges

_overandout_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After we finished, he went under the covers and started touching me. At first I thought he was trying to give me "oral pleasure". It turns out he lost the condom inside of me and was trying to fish it out before I noticed. FML

Today, I came home crying and informed my mother that someone had called me a 'fat bitch' today. She held me at arms length, looked me straight in the eyes, and lovingly said, "You can't change who you are." FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2011 at 12:16pm / Ireland (Meath) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why it would be highly offensive and inappropriate for him to go as Caylee Anthony for Halloween. I think he's still planning on doing it. FML

by Miroslav208 / 10/20/2011 at 10:32am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I found my "lost" bicycle in my best friend's garage. I've been having to catch two buses to get to work for the past few months. FML

by jwhizzle / 10/20/2011 at 7:51am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's jaw was swollen due to him not taking care of a cracked tooth. He's convinced it was actually caused by an STD, and accused me of giving it to him. FML

by STIdiot / 10/17/2011 at 8:12am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, it's my sister's birthday. My parents got her a cat. I have serious allergies when it comes to cats. When I brought this issue up with my parents, they replied, "This day is not about you, it's about your sister." I can feel my throat tightening already. FML

by Cats...FML / 10/17/2011 at 7:46am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years felt comfortable enough with me to disclose that he had previously spent 4 years in a mental institute because he tried to kill his mother. He also told me we will be together forever. I'm scared. FML

by bubba / 10/17/2011 at 6:02am / China / Love

Today, my 28-year-old brother who has been pranking me all my life, put a chocolate cupcake on my chair. I sat on it, with my white dress. On my wedding day. FML

by cupcake_butt / 10/17/2011 at 4:39am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML

by pokeballbra / 10/17/2011 at 1:44am / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking, "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML

by blarp / 10/17/2011 at 12:20am / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, at my job in the cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like you. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML

by Mayabie / 10/16/2011 at 5:08pm / France / Work

Today, I tried to hint to my husband that we needed a new washing machine. I mentioned that we got our current one way back on our wedding day. He replied, "Yeah, and I got you too." FML

by poluxe / 10/16/2011 at 5:08pm / France / Love

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

by myasshurts / 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids