About _daniellesays_ : Say what you will about the importance of grammar, but I think you automatically (in general) get a few more respect points for writing like this, instade of lyk dis.
Anyway, hi.
I feel that they should update this App so messages work on it, 'specially since that's what most of us here are using.
I love the lyric from the song 23 by Jimmy Eat World, "No one else will have me like you do; No one else will have me, only you" , + the way Jim Adkins sings it.
Did you know that dolphins rape people?
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied, "Why do you think I've been so often on top lately?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25039) - you deserved it (6018)
On 12/09/2011 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I heard vibrating from inside my husband's desk drawer. Since he's away for the weekend, I investigated. I found an unfamiliar cellphone with an inbound call. I answered it. Turns out, it was his mistress. Neither of us can get a hold of him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36884) - you deserved it (2195)
On 12/04/2011 at 6:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)
Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28240) - you deserved it (4224)
On 12/04/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found out that the gentle, adorable oral surgeon who took out my wisdom teeth last year was recently arrested for rape. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23997) - you deserved it (1698)
On 12/03/2011 at 1:43am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mom bought me pepper spray in case anyone tried to "mess" with me. I put it in my purse. Later, a guy snatched my purse before I even had the chance to take out the pepper spray. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19569) - you deserved it (2588)
On 12/02/2011 at 12:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24464) - you deserved it (2850)
On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend rear ended a cop car because he was texting me. I was sitting next to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11709) - you deserved it (16593)
On 11/30/2011 at 8:10pm - misc - by yessir - United States
Today, my fiancé insists that instead of kissing at the crucial moment of our wedding ceremony, we should give each other a high five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32934) - you deserved it (4315)
On 11/30/2011 at 6:17am - love - by no low five (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try something new. I ended up tied to the bed, and my girlfriend discovered how ticklish I am. Worst 3 hours of my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27906) - you deserved it (6179)
On 11/30/2011 at 1:43am - intimacy - by me - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I'm spending time with my granny, with whom I'm supposed to live with for a few weeks. I've noticed that she repeats the last word of every sentence I say, and now I'm wondering how it's possible for me to now be so horrible that I want to punch a sweet 92-year-old lady in the head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17649) - you deserved it (3671)
On 11/29/2011 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, a guy lost control of his umbrella in the wind, which then hit me in the eye, making me bleed. He screamed at me for trying to steal his umbrella. People laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26551) - you deserved it (1347)
On 11/29/2011 at 6:59pm - misc - by anon - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I found out my dad has been sending dirty text messages to my mom. Which wouldn't be a problem except they're divorced and my dad is remarried. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24177) - you deserved it (1769)
On 11/29/2011 at 8:31am - intimacy - by bgoodwin07 - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend came home, chugged a beer, and passed out in our bed without saying hello or goodnight to me. I've been on vacation for a week and was hoping to cuddle. But no, if I try to touch him, he hits me and growls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23028) - you deserved it (4669)
On 11/29/2011 at 3:00am - love - by LadyDean - United States (North Dakota)
Today, at work, an overweight man riding an electric cart started peeing all around the store. I had to clean it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22542) - you deserved it (1410)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:34am - work - by kait - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend became convinced that I cheated on him, and broke up with me, saying he would "get me back." When I came home, I found his key on my counter and my cat missing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22134) - you deserved it (2276)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:14am - animals - by reallyupset (woman) - United States (New York)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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