_cassandra_

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_cassandra_

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1293
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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_cassandra_'s page activity

Visits<b>marmaries</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 11:01pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 8:12am<b>rcbarnes</b> - the 12/06/2011 at 12:59am<b>agreatday</b> - the 10/28/2011 at 12:25am<b>IntoTheClouds</b> - the 10/14/2011 at 8:58am<b>unicornofthesea</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 12:23pm<b>WaistDownUnder</b> - the 08/01/2011 at 4:28pm<b>tehzilla</b> - the 05/24/2011 at 8:22am<b>bhc1</b> - the 05/08/2011 at 9:01pm<b>RexterDenver</b> - the 04/13/2011 at 2:08pm<b>matthewdb</b> - the 04/12/2011 at 7:10am<b>Sprezlaus</b> - the 03/17/2011 at 2:43am<b>JR_HIGH_SUCKS</b> - the 03/11/2011 at 4:11pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 3:18am<b>KatieSalvatore96</b> - the 03/03/2011 at 7:49pm<b>pinz26</b> - the 03/02/2011 at 1:40pm<b>Charlottey</b> - the 02/25/2011 at 11:09am<b>incognito1520</b> - the 02/17/2011 at 8:48pm

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_cassandra_'s favorite FMLs

Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML

by crzyry / 02/22/2012 at 10:49pm / Canada (Quebec) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend, who is supposed to protect me from murderers and rapists, had an emotional breakdown because he was so excited that I'd cooked french fries for dinner. FML

by Anonymous / 01/17/2012 at 8:20am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother and I proposed to our girlfriends at the same time. We had perfect synchronization after practicing for days. My brother's girlfriend said yes, mine said no. FML

by emmmbo / 12/19/2011 at 10:40am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, I learned that my hairdo must resemble a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML

by inpain / 12/02/2011 at 12:14am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

by unknown52 / 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Health

Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML

by sometingwong / 12/01/2011 at 3:32pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was lying on the floor playing with my cat. I was holding her in the air, when my sister tripped over the TV cord and unplugged the cable. The TV made a loud fuzzy sound, I got scared and threw my cat in the air. I got scratched in the face by a falling cat. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2011 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was lying on the floor playing with my cat. I was holding her in the air, when my sister tripped over the TV cord and unplugged the cable. The TV made a loud fuzzy sound, I got scared and threw my cat in the air. I got scratched in the face by a falling cat. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2011 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, while watching a man in front of me on the bus remove his cap to scratch his noggin, I noticed the swarm of dandruff that was about to nail me in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2011 at 11:23am / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I got a letter of complaint from my landlord. It said my loud, obnoxious trampling is disturbing my downstairs neighbor, and I have to stop. I'm small and hardly weigh anything, but it seems that if I want to keep my lease, I'll have to master the art of levitating. FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2011 at 3:49pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I moved to California. Too bad the rest of my belongings didn't. FML

by tomoxishigaki / 11/16/2011 at 8:32pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my son got really high and shaved the dog with my electric shaver. Not only does the dog look really bad, I didn't know my son used drugs. I now have to buy the dog a sweater and get my son some help. FML

by Anonymous / 10/26/2011 at 1:43am / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, I was napping. I woke up to my pillow making some sounds. Thinking it was my head shifting my pillow, I went back to sleep. Later on I woke up to the sounds again, and a mouse staring at my face. FML

by pinkjade / 10/25/2011 at 3:17am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

by Virginiedetibo / 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML

by crankg / 10/21/2011 at 12:57am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous