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Today, I was having sex with a really hot guy. It was going great until his 6-year-old brother walked in and screamed so loudly it brought both of his parents running. FML

#15250812
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34969) - you deserved it (18384)

On 03/09/2011 at 12:12pm - intimacy - by prdept. (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Yesterday... I found outhy my cell phone has been going missing every night for the last few months. My sister has been "borrowing" it so she can hold it against her crotch and repeatedly push the vibrate button.

#15127410
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54387) - you deserved it (4721)

On 02/26/2011 at 3:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I Was Askd Out By A Guy I've Likd Since The Beginning Of The Year. All I Could Say Was, "I Have To Pee", And Ran Into The Men's Bathroom. FML

#15031615
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26659) - you deserved it (15785)

On 02/18/2011 at 8:35pm - love - by blaahh (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up to a text from mah boyfriend asking if I'd Skype with him. Thinking he'd find mah tousld bd hair and big t-shirt sexy, I went on. The first thing he noticd was the massive booger on mah face that stretchd from mah nose to the other side of mah cheek. FML

#15015592
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11971) - you deserved it (34265)

On 02/17/2011 at 12:29pm - misc - by Whatever479 - Ireland (Dublin)

Today... looool I found my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML

#15015231
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32519) - you deserved it (2874)

On 02/17/2011 at 11:33am - animals - by Aled (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my friend finally convincd me that if I pickd up her cat it wouldn't scratch my eyes out . It ped on me instead . FML

#15011616
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23886) - you deserved it (3726)

On 02/17/2011 at 12:58am - animals - by hannah (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the vending machine, putted in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. mega FML

#15006025
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26312) - you deserved it (9135)

On 02/16/2011 at 6:58pm - misc - by CandyMachine (woman) - United States (Colorado)

TODAY, AT THE LIBRARY, SOMEBODY LEFT THEMSELVES LOGGED IN TO FACEBOOK ON A PUBLIC COMPUTER AFTER THEY HAD LEFT!! TRYING TO TEACH THEM A LESSON, I UPDATED THEIR FACEBOOK STATUS TO SOMETHING OUTRAGEOUS!! THAT'SHEN THEY CUMMED BACK TO THE COMPUTER AFTER GETTING SOMETHING FROM THE PRINTER!! FML

#15005478
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6159) - you deserved it (60499)

On 02/16/2011 at 6:16pm - misc - by fail (woman) - United States (Michigan)

TODAY, I HAD MAH BOYFRIEND COME OVER FOR DINNER FOR THE FRST TIME. IT WAS ALL GOING WELL UNTIL MAH DAD STARTED EXPLAINING TO MAH BOYFRIEND HOW TO USE TOILET PAPER. HE EVEN DEMONSTRATED IT. FAT FML

#15001986
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29673) - you deserved it (2826)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:03pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, while sitting on the couch, mah boyfriend cummd over, pulld his penis out of his fly, and startd stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. big fat FML

#14990668
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46362) - you deserved it (13279)

On 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

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