Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

_VAL3NT1NA_

Search for a member

_VAL3NT1NA_

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 26 November 1998 (15 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 310
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About _VAL3NT1NA_ : The name is Val, but you can call me Val, i am here to read your FML's... Your Welcome!! =)

_VAL3NT1NA_'s page activity

Visits<b>Ayezed</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 2:59pm<b>Andicc</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 7:30pm<b>Clay_Pidgeon</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 12:38am<b>dooka121</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 4:08am<b>aedan12</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 9:53am<b>wingedangel123</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 10:07pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 02/11/2013 at 7:31am<b>kino22x</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 11:23pm<b>IzzyGSDC</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 2:08pm<b>Anjyl</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 11:14am<b>BlitheNightmare</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 4:53am<b>HitMeWithMusic10</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 10:21pm<b>alissa412</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 10:16pm<b>chimichangaballs</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 6:36pm<b>soulman281</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 4:20pm<b>BadKitty14</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 4:19pm<b>bebec6</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 10:47am<b>red225</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 10:23am

_VAL3NT1NA_'s FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of _VAL3NT1NA_'s badges

_VAL3NT1NA_'s favorite FMLs

Today, while at the store with my mom, we ran into the girl I recently confessed to being interested in. My mom decided to shout, "IS THAT HER?! IS THAT THE GIRL YOU LIKE?!" Embarrassed, I desperately told her to be quiet. She grounded me for being "rude" to her. FML

#20508609
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34059) - you deserved it (3255)

On 02/15/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimed he somehow "fell onto". It was lodged up his nostril. I'm marrying this man in a week. FML

#20508531
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25945) - you deserved it (4555)

On 02/15/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Venezuela (Lara)

Today, my girlfriend finally said that she finally felt ready to have sex with me. It ended up being so terrible that I only managed to get some pleasure out of it when my mind drifted to the thought of going to Olive Garden later and eating some of their breadsticks. FML

#20508270
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38202) - you deserved it (9357)

On 02/15/2013 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by Acolyte of the Bacon God (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mum got the idea of switching to a different dishwashing detergent. The new one is so strong that it coats all the dishes in a nauseating perfume-like smell. It's so pungent that it gets absorbed into everything we eat or drink. She's determined to use up the entire bottle. FML

#20508218
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24110) - you deserved it (1918)

On 02/15/2013 at 1:50pm - health - by selena5112 (woman) - Norway (Troms)

Today, whilst on a phone interview with a college I really want to go to, my mother picks up the other line and shouts into the phone "She's not going to college, she's lazy and she'll only disappoint you." The interviewer hung up before I could say anything. FML

#20508072
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38358) - you deserved it (2549)

On 02/15/2013 at 10:50am - misc - by parentalissues (woman) - United States

Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML

#20498986
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19339) - you deserved it (39928)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

#20497837
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57230) - you deserved it (10845)

On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I won $50 on the lottery. On the subway home, I checked my pocket to see if the money was still there. A very professional man in a suit yelled, "Hey, that's mine!" I got several dirty glares. I'm such a pathetic wimp that I gave him the money. FML

#20497390
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12658) - you deserved it (49597)

On 02/07/2013 at 7:28pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML

#20480979
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40076) - you deserved it (9564)

On 01/27/2013 at 6:10am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML

#20480710
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29793) - you deserved it (3453)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, while trying to quietly sneak a midnight snack with my girlfriend, I was slowly opening the pantry door so I wouldn't wake my mother. My girlfriend came and swung open the door onto my foot, taking the top layer of skin with it. FML

#20456813
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30128) - you deserved it (4616)

On 01/13/2013 at 7:41am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML

#20453308
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39236) - you deserved it (6372)

On 01/11/2013 at 6:36am - love - by GiraffeLover - Australia

Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML

#20444863
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26320) - you deserved it (8027)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm - love - by lifsabtch (man) -

Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML

#20444730
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27502) - you deserved it (3521)

On 01/06/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: