_Damien_

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_Damien_

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 June 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2235
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About _Damien_ : SENIORRRRRR BBY!!

_Damien_'s page activity

Visits<b>Erin2009</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 11:49pm<b>ozzy7899</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 5:36pm<b>footcheezeez</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 1:09pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:41pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 7:02am<b>Alpha35</b> - the 12/23/2010 at 1:50am<b>velvel</b> - the 11/21/2010 at 5:01pm<b>frenchboy95</b> - the 09/29/2010 at 6:14pm<b>QTp13</b> - the 09/21/2010 at 3:40pm<b>cwark</b> - the 08/23/2010 at 1:10pm<b>1337_RoXxXor</b> - the 04/08/2010 at 4:19pm<b>hereisnowhy</b> - the 03/21/2010 at 5:46pm

_Damien_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

_Damien_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I received a text message from my wife who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends: "Have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you tomorrow morning." His? FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2011 at 1:21am / Love

Today, my 14 year old son got suspended and I had to pay for the damage after he sprayed "FUCK THE POLICE" on the back wall of his school. I'm a policeman. FML

by duckthehack / 01/28/2011 at 9:25am / Poland (Wielkopolskie) / Kids

Today, while putting a drip in the back of an elderly patient's hand, he commented that he didn't realise doctors had pierced nipples, but not to worry because he's only in the hospital "for the b*tches". FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2010 at 4:37pm / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the doctor's to get a checkup. When the nurse stuck the Otoscope into my ear to look, she was disgusted. When she pulled it out, she told me that I had an ear infection, and that she'd popped a pimple in there by mistake. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my recently married friend took off her wedding ring to make bread. Being single and pathetic, I tried it on to see what it would look like. It got stuck on my finger. The ER doctor had to cut it off. FML

by lisa / 12/22/2010 at 1:03pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

by Christopher / 12/13/2010 at 4:16am / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via facebook. I don't even have a facebook. My friends had to tell me. FML

by itsover / 12/11/2010 at 12:05am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML

by fme / 12/08/2010 at 9:34am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that before I can legally drink, I will have been married, divorced, and pregnant. FML

by Username / 12/05/2010 at 12:04pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got hit in the mouth with a hockey stick and lost four teeth. Yesterday I got my braces of six years removed. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2010 at 2:10pm / Ireland (Monaghan) / Health

Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML

by Laura / 11/29/2010 at 10:03pm / Kids

Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML

by Laura / 11/29/2010 at 10:03pm / Kids

Today, it was my 21st birthday. I had a simple party with my boyfriend, with just a cake and a bottle of red wine. My boyfriend managed to get so drunk that he danced naked for 10 minutes, then told me I'm hideously obese but that he loves me anyway. FML

by sadinmass / 11/13/2010 at 8:24am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, at work I was looking for my lost wallet. After hours of looking I gave up and went home. The wallet then shows up in my mail box with an envelope marked "To the asshole." I opened the letter and it was filled with poop. My wallet too. FML

by Anonymous / 11/12/2010 at 2:06am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, while on the bus, I began to fall asleep. Suddenly, a man next to me started laughing very loudly, scaring me and jolting me out from my nap. I was so scared, I reflexively punched the girl in front of me in the face. I was pinned down by three other men while the cops were called. FML

by snoozlagist / 10/30/2010 at 12:52am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation