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Zvonimir

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Zvonimir

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 April 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 560
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Zvonimir's page activity

Visits<b>spoenza</b> - the 09/07/2011 at 8:17am

Zvonimir's FML badges

50 favourites

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Zvonimir's favorite FMLs

Today, my manager called me into his office and spent half an hour screaming at me for granting one of our workers so many religious off-days. Apparently, the name of these "religious observances" actually means something to the effect of "scoring some pussy" in Macedonian. FML

#19909832
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19641) - you deserved it (3729)

On 07/08/2012 at 2:32pm - work - by a4rk (man) - Malaysia (Sarawak)

Today, I sneezed my jaw out of socket. Yes, this is possible. FML

#19899616
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29164) - you deserved it (1873)

On 07/06/2012 at 11:03am - misc - by hotpatata - United States

Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to live with her father because they have a faster internet connection. FML

#19875787
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26287) - you deserved it (5576)

On 07/01/2012 at 12:00pm - kids - by grrr1234 -

Today, not only does my cat rabidly attack my face if I don't let him sleep on my pillow, but he snores too. FML

#19874038
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17006) - you deserved it (4671)

On 07/01/2012 at 12:30am - animals - by emi -

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37228) - you deserved it (4005)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I went to the circus with my family. When we were looking at the animals during the break, an elephant took my purse with his trunk and ate it. It crushed my cellphone, camera, keys and wallet. After that, the circus director yelled at me for feeding poisonous stuff to his elephant. FML

#19769177
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27274) - you deserved it (4702)

On 06/11/2012 at 3:14am - animals - by ILoveAnimals (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I was using a public toilet when someone entered the stall next to mine. Instead of using the facilities, the person in there reached under the stall to steal my bag. Fortunately, I was holding the strap so they couldn't take it. Unfortunately, they decided to take my right shoe instead. FML

Today, I was running late and couldn't find my purse anywhere. My sleep-deprived brain came up with the brilliant idea of trying to phone it. FML

#19756229
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16672) - you deserved it (4269)

On 06/08/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by PEGASISTER FOR LIIIIIIIIFFFFFEEEEE!!!!! (woman) - Mexico

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

#19710494
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28043) - you deserved it (2716) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm - love - by Monsieur-Madame (man) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, my cat woke me up, but not by kneading on me though. Instead, she woke me up by pouncing on the laser pointer my dad was shining on my face. FML

#19673871
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19845) - you deserved it (2163)

On 05/24/2012 at 5:18pm - animals - by XxEmoWolfiexX (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML

#19618137
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8154) - you deserved it (30633)

On 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm - misc - by smh (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that all the times I checked behind the shower curtain before peeing didn't prepare me for what to do if someone was actually there. FML

#19616275
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30270) - you deserved it (3559)

On 05/13/2012 at 11:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized I was getting a bit chubbier than usual. I decided to go for a little jog to stay in shape. Little did I know, my neighbors that just moved in brought along with them, a fully grown German Shepherd. Not tamed. My "jog" quickly turned into a "sprint for my life". FML

#19600497
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24416) - you deserved it (2546)

On 05/09/2012 at 11:34pm - misc - by I Don't Exorcise - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I married the man of my dreams. While I was being driven to our wedding reception, I checked my Facebook. My husband had just updated his status to "Me and the bitch just got hitched." FML

#19582200
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28602) - you deserved it (6423)

On 05/06/2012 at 2:01pm - love - by Bridget (woman) - United Kingdom



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