About Zoutie : I live in the boring state of North Dakota
I love playing games (rockband 2 in particular), skateboarding, swimming, traveling and taking care of my youngest brother.
I like almost all music, my favorite bands are Angels & Airwaves, Blink-182, Rancid, Social Distortion, All that Remains, Killswitch Engage, Chiodos, In Fear and Faith, Simple Plan, Emarosa, Quietdrive, Children of Nova and Eiffle 65, Audible Mainframe, Sherwood, Cinematic Sunrise, The Allman Brothers Band and Third Eye Blind just to name a few bands.
Facebook page- http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/profile.php?id=100001001054852
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33047) - you deserved it (6591)
On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45597) - you deserved it (2034)
Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21754) - you deserved it (1945)
On 02/18/2010 at 7:44pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I saw a roach on my toilet. I thought it would be funny to pee on it. It jumped out, which scared me; I hit my head on the wall and started bleeding, then I peed all over me and the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6253) - you deserved it (30695)
On 12/22/2009 at 2:18pm - misc - by funyfunkid (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5241) - you deserved it (63203)
On 11/27/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by obsessed (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, while at work, I was picking up paper in the bathroom. In one stall I saw what I thought was a wadded piece of the brown paper to dry your hands. It wasn't until I realized it was sticking to my bare hand that I realized it was feces. Human feces. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20070) - you deserved it (10120)
On 11/24/2009 at 8:00pm - misc - by Oddity_C - United States (Florida)
Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75014) - you deserved it (10601)
On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6219) - you deserved it (28092)
On 10/13/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40462) - you deserved it (3591)
On 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by screwwyou (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (42386) - you deserved it (6311)
On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45828) - you deserved it (11147)
On 07/27/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by fmysexlife (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, at martial arts practice, a guest sensei wanted to teach me some "manners". He pinned me down and proceded to choke me while crushing my nuts with his hands and yelling at me in front of the whole class, "DOES THAT HURT?!!?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (37144) - you deserved it (6500)
On 07/15/2009 at 9:21am - misc - by GrippedMyBalls - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)
Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9017) - you deserved it (85489)
On 06/19/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went out on a first date with a cute guy. Turns out we won't be going on a date again because I didn't know the difference between "Star Wars" and "Star Trek." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24660) - you deserved it (48661)
On 05/15/2009 at 5:17pm - love - by not4geeks (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13594) - you deserved it (84661)
On 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Monday 20 May 2013
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